Normal

We’re quite protective over the notion of normal.

Before we rush back to “normal” can we just pause and think about what parts of “normal” we really want to rush back to.

For starters – what exactly is normal?

In our present day, normal is perhaps most often used to mean “conforming to a type, standard, or regular pattern,” or “ordinary or usual; the same as would be expected.” But types, standards, and regular patterns (or what is considered “regular”) unquestionably shift, as we have seen in the last few weeks during lockdown. Yet each of these definitions can lead to different (and contradictory) interpretations of what normal could really mean.

What is normal for one person may be abnormal for another.

As I have started to ponder what normal actually means, over time I have attached my own meaning to the words normal and abnormal. Ultimately I’ve realised that normal has a very different meaning for everyone!

Whatever your new normal is, ask yourself what have I discovered about myself? Then, going forward together, lets choose to build a more humane, compassionate and sustainable world – please!

So, what new normal are you creating for yourself?

Life

In “A Tale of Two Cities” – Charles Dickens wrote these words to describe life in France and England in 1775, maybe they describe even better the conditions of our day.

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.
It was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness.
It was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity.
It was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness.
It was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair.
We had everything before us, we had nothing before us”

In our day, we are daily witnesses to a sweeping panorama into the depths of despair, then upwards to the glorious heights of beautiful acts of kindness that lift our spirits and souls once more.

For many of us, it is unlike any other time we have ever experienced before. Eventually however, I believe these challenges will pass.

Now is the time to consider – what is really vital? What really matters most? What do I really want? What is my purpose here on earth? What is the highest priority in my life?

Why not take some time today, to pause and reflect upon these simple questions. As you listen for that still small voice, reach out for the insights and inspiration. You may have to wait a while, but answers always come.

Think!

Lately, I have reflected on many of the wonderful experiences I’ve had in my life. My journals too have really helped me to recall some great memories.

My invitation today is a simple one.

It is a really valuable exercise every once in a while to close your eyes and think! Whilst doing so, you can reflect upon lots of questions – try this one for starters…

“What is the most wonderful moment I have lived through during the last year?”

It could be a special large event, or a very simple moment or a lovely conversation with a good friend. Big or small, it doesn’t matter. Simply slow down, close your eyes, take a moment, remember that special occasion and let the warm feelings that will come lift your spirits and fill your soul. I know that memories have great power!

Remember – change starts in your thoughts!

Extraordinary

To be someone out of the ordinary means to be successful, unique, and outstanding.
In these extraordinary times, I feel it in my bones, that each of us – more than ever – need to be the very best we can be. It is all too easy for us to look inward and centre our thoughts on the challenges we may face in our individual situations, it can even get us down. But we must look beyond ourselves – it is vital for our families, our communities and our nation.
WHAT CAN YOU DO?
Even the smallest of simple acts of service, can make a huge difference in the life of a friend or family member.
𝐍𝐨𝐰 is the time to act. Just like the sacrifices our healthcare nurses and doctors are giving every single day, we need to forget ourselves and go to work!
For a whole week now I have been following the remarkable story of Captain Tom Moore.  Approaching his 100th birthday, he desired to do something extraordinary and raise £1000 for the NHS.  His idea, to complete 100 laps of his garden, with the help of his walking frame. Currently he has just passed £12 Million. His one simple extraordinary act, has inspired nearly 1 million people to step up and help.
So, again I ask – what can you do?
We have a world to save, a nation to strengthen, a community to help, friends, neighbours and family to bless. One by One. Lets go to work!

What are your anchors?

Our greatest struggle is within ourselves.
Consider this definition of an anchor “a person or thing that provides stability or confidence in an otherwise uncertain situation.”
In our topsy turvy commotion filled world, all that can be shaken is being shaken. Life has a way of testing our anchors causing us to drift from the safety and protection they provide.

Fragility

Life remains fragile.

Like many people all across the world, I have been moved and concerned about COVID-19. It has led me to reflect upon how fragile many things really are. Under the semblance of control we think we have, sadly, we are sorely inadequate at so many things.

In the case of a fleeting few days, the world as we know it, has changed. Its actually a little scary to recognise how vulnerable and delicate our planet and life as we know it really are. The feeble foundation of the global financial system is one thing.  The deep cracks within many nations, another. The volatility and ferocity of Mother Nature. The frailties of the human body.  Need I go on? All have been exposed to turmoil and disruption.

Let’s be mindful of our fragility and 𝗴𝗿𝗮𝘀𝗽 hold of it, snuggle up to it. Oftentimes it is the fragile nature of something that makes it very precious.

Consider where you are unnecessarily fragile.

In the days ahead as we rebuild our lives and society starts to recover, lets be ever mindful of the 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘴 that will return once more. We must choose to construct our houses on rock, just like the wise man and not on a sandy foundation, like the foolish man.

All of us will need to dig deep and ensure that we stand on solid foundations so that we are prepared and resilient enough to withstand the storms which will inevitably return.

Strings of Life

Summer holidays were always something to look forward to for our family.  Dad was a train driver. In summer  we would always travel as far away as possible on our free family rail tickets!

For several years, we headed down south to Devon & Cornwall. Ilfracombe, Baggy Point, Lands End, Cornish Pasties and ice cream with a big dollop of clotted cream on top are all fond memories. The beaches were always the very best!

Summer 1972

We were staying in a caravan in Ilfracombe. That particular summer, dad took some time to share with me the intricacies of flying a kite. I recall going into a large field on the caravan site, and getting it ready to fly. I’d never flown a kite before, but he patiently taught me the rudimentary skills in order to get it to launch skyward.

We unravelled the string, and he showed me what I needed to do. Firstly though, he held the string and I was asked to throw the kite into the air, to catch the wind.  It took some effort and persistence, but after a few attempts, the kite soared into the air. After watching it fly for a little while, he handed me the string. Like magic, as I tugged on the string and let out a little more and more length, it would soar higher and higher. It took some getting used to, but I just loved watching that kite glide gracefully in the air.

Lessons Learned

Since that day in 1972, I have flown several kites.  I have also enjoyed some lovely occasions teaching my own children kite flying skills. One of the most powerful lessons I have learned in life I can trace back to that day, when I learned how to fly a kite.

Its as simple as this – as long as a kite is attached to a string, it will fly high up in the sky. You may think that since it is pulling and tugging on the string, that it would go higher if it was to be set free. But it is not so, if you let go of the string, it will just plummet to the earth. It seems odd that the very thing that keeps the kite down is actually what keeps it up.

And this is true not only of kites but of life.  

There are many strings tied to us from our childhood. Those rules and regulations that seem to hold us down, are actually holding us up. In my childhood, I began to understand.  Through life experience I grasped the value of obedience and compliance to rules and regulations. Obedience brings safety, peace and reassurance to one and all. Indeed obedience can be classified as a cure all, for a multitude of woes and challenges of society today.  Our success or failure will depend upon personal self-discipline and observance to the rules of life.

When I obey, I begin to understand.

In our families, our homes, our communities and our professional working lives, lets be obedient to the laws, the regulations and the guiding principles (the strings) set up so that like the kite, we too can soar high in all of our earthly pursuits – whatever they may be.

Becoming

Changes in life have been many recently: good and bad, sudden and progressive, minor and major. Many have dealt with being furloughed, losing a loved one, or being isolated at home. Dealing with change is an inseparable part of life’s journey.
I recall some years ago learning a story about little acorns. Just like a giant oak tree produces little acorns, so an acorn may 𝗯𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲 an oak tree. But, not all acorns become oak trees, only those who break through their hardened shells and reach for the sky.
Similarly – in these difficult times are you reaching upwards, moving forward, seizing opportunities for new experiences and growth. Or are you wallowing in the mire of self pity, and like some little acorns, forgetting what you can become?
This time of enforced solitude is a tremendous opportunity for self reflection, learning and growth.
Little acorns have all the qualities of giant oaks, they just need time to grow. Opposition, challenge and difficulty are part of growth. It takes time, effort, perseverance, set-backs will be inevitable and adaptation certain. This is the process of life.
Don’t forget “The best way to treat obstacles is to use them as stepping stones. Laugh at them, tread on them and let them lead you to something better.” Enid Blyton
In these challenging times, remember who you are and what you can become.

Are you OK?

How are you coping? Are you OK?

Whilst out for my exercise allowance yesterday, I really appreciated our local beauty spot, known in our neighbourhood as “the Glen.” As I was admiring the charm of nature, my thoughts drifted into thinking about all of the material possessions I had accumulated in life. All those things I had worked so hard to acquire….. just did not matter at all.

A scripture from Matthew 6, ran through my mind “Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal….For where your treasure is, there will be your heart also.”

𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗺𝘆 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘁? 𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗶𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘁?

I recognised very quickly that 𝗮𝗹𝗹 that 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 matters is our family and relationships with others. Previously, I have recorded many thoughts about ownership and stewardship. We own very little and yet are stewards over much.

𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗱𝗼𝗲𝘀 𝘀𝘁𝗲𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗱𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗽 𝗺𝗲𝗮𝗻 𝘁𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂?

These times of peril and adversity have a way of refocusing our priorities. The trials, hardships, difficulties and challenges of today 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 pass. How we choose how to act each day, will impact upon our family and personal relationships for generations to come. Please consider this counsel from a wise leader – Dieter F. Uchtdorf when he said “Why, then, do we devote so much of our time and energy to things that are so fleeting, so inconsequential, and so superficial? Do we refuse to see the folly in the pursuit of the trivial and transient?”

In these challenging times consider once again what really matters most, where does your treasure lie?

Do not Fear

In the course of our life, we do not exactly know what lies ahead. 𝙏𝙤𝙙𝙖𝙮, people all over the world are fearful of the challenges ahead. What we do know, is that it will be filled with worry, anxiety, hazards, uncertainty, peril, difficulties and risks. The world is in commotion – pandemics, economic strife, floods, earthquakes, wildfires, panic buying – and that’s only this year.

I am however and always will be an optimist. Our capacities are likely to be tested and stretched. On occasions our hopes may even fade. But this dizzying moment of alarm and discouragement 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 pass. We will recover, triumph and bounce back from these setbacks and adversities.

In one for the many workshops I have facilitated over the last few years, I recall Darwin’s “On the Origin of Species” in it he states, “it is not the most intellectual of the species that survives; it is not the strongest that survives; but the species that survives is the one that is able best to 𝙖𝙙𝙖𝙥𝙩 and 𝙖𝙙𝙟𝙪𝙨𝙩 to the changing environment in which it finds itself”.

Top Tips for building resilience:

– Remind yourself of your personal purpose in life

– Generate positive thoughts

– Connect with others – daily

– Take action, be proactive

– Focus on what you can do

– Look after yourself