Tag Archive for: Learning

The Power of the Small

Yesterday, whilst driving to Perth, I was listening to Radio 4 when a true story was shared about an event from this week, 65 years ago, that I’d never heard before.
On 24 January 1961, a U.S. Air Force B-52 bomber suffered a catastrophic failure over eastern North Carolina. The incident is now known as the Goldsboro crash.
The aircraft was carrying two thermonuclear bombs, each with a yield hundreds of times more powerful than Hiroshima.
A fuel leak worsened mid-flight.
As the crew attempted to land, the aircraft broke apart in the air near Goldsboro.
Five of the eight crew members managed to eject. Three were killed.
Both nuclear bombs fell.
One descended by parachute and landed largely intact.
The other began its arming sequence.
Safety systems failed. One after another.
All but one final, low-voltage switch.
That small component, unremarkable, unseen – prevented a nuclear detonation.
The system just held. Barely.
It was a near-miss, at the height of the Cold War, and the scale of it is hard to comprehend.

Lessons Learned

What stayed with me isn’t the drama of the moment, but the imbalance of it all.
A tiny switch. Against a catastrophic outcome.
It’s a sobering reminder that in complex systems, and also in leadership, learning, and life – things rarely fall apart because of one big failure. They unravel through the accumulation of small things: assumptions left unchecked, habits ignored, signals dismissed as insignificant etc.
And sometimes, survival comes down not to heroics or bold intervention, but to something small simply doing what it was meant to do.
As the end of the day, small things, really are big things.
Co-facilitating the Lead the Way programme at Aviva yesterday, made me wonder what the “small switches” are in our teams, our organisations, our families and even ourselves.
The things we barely notice.
The moments we’re tempted to dismiss.
Because occasionally, those small things turn out to be everything.
What small thing, quietly holding in your world right now, might matter far more than you realise?

Why leaders tell stories

We’re all unique.
If you are anything like me, through our daily experiences, each of us gathers small nuggets of wisdom.
When we share our stories, we pass those nuggets on.
They help others learn, reflect, change, and grow.
That has certainly been my experience over the last few months.
In my new role as a leadership facilitator with Aviva, I’ve shared many personal stories.
Not to be the centre of attention, but to support learning and development.
It’s about being vulnerable and building connection by sharing a story with your whole heart.
Life experience has taught me that you need to be able to share your personal and organisational stories in all kinds of settings.
These last few months the stories I have shared have mostly been in the learning rooms or a virtual session.
Some stories are small, others are long, some are funny and entertaining, whilst others are serious and significant.
But the best stories, are always the ones that come to you in the very moment you need them.
I’ve learned to trust that. When a story comes to mind, it’s usually there for a reason.
Last week, during a leadership session, a story surfaced unexpectedly.
I asked for a volunteer and shared an experience from thirty years ago that had suddenly come into my thoughts and the impact was immediate.
It opened up insight, discussion, and learning for everyone in the room.
Don’t be afraid to tell your stories in those moments of truth.
Storytelling is a powerful leadership and learning tool. When used with intention, it creates connection, deepens understanding, and brings learning to life.
If you’ve been carrying a story, one shaped by success, challenge, failure, or learning, consider sharing it.
You never quite know who needs to hear it, or what it might unlock for them.
I’d love to hear your stories too.
The moments that shaped you, taught you something unexpected, or changed the way you lead or live.
What would change if you trusted your story and shared it when it surfaced?

Learning by Doing

Last week, whilst down in London, I spent some time with a couple of colleagues puzzling over a new activity for our learning programme.
The bench test in our team meeting suggested it needed a little tweaking. A few “what ifs”, some honest debate, a couple of scribbles on paper… and a revised version emerged.
Yesterday, it went live for real.
One of the things I enjoy most about my work as a facilitator is designing experiential activities that allow people to discover leadership and behavioural principles for themselves, rather than simply being told about them.
Yesterday was no exception.
As the activity was introduced in a very simple manner, I noticed those familiar puzzled expressions around the room, including the slight head tilt, the raised eyebrow, the quiet “I’m not quite sure where this is going…” look.
Off they all went…
Within minutes, those faces softened, conversations sparked, and each group leaned in, fully absorbed in the task at hand.
Half an hour later, as the groups returned to the main room to share their thinking, there was a gentle nervous anticipation in the air.
Presentations followed. Then table discussions. Then a facilitator debrief.

And so…?

And just like that, many of the leadership behaviours we’d hoped would surface began to reveal themselves – sometimes explicitly, sometimes subtly, often with a few smiles along the way.
Sitting there, as I observed it all unfold, I was reminded of something simple but important: you can learn a great deal by watching…
But the much deeper learning for us as facilitators doesn’t live in the design alone; it lives in the very moment, in how we read the room, respond to what’s emerging, and trusting ourselves to act accordingly.
And that’s the bit I never tire of watching happen.
Off to start day 2 this morning and learn a little more! 😊
What recent experience has quietly reshaped how you lead the way?

Drawn to Learn

One of the habits I’ve carried with me for a long time is having my head buried in personal and leadership development books.

Over the years, I’ve gathered countless ideas and insights through my reading, many of which have shaped my thinking, my coaching, and the way I show up.

In almost every learning session I facilitate, I take a small stack of these books along with me, that I feel relevant for the topics at hand.

I place them quietly at the front of the room, arranged at eye level, just visible enough to stir a little curiosity.

Surfacing Ideas

Whilst facilitating, a thought, a principle, or an idea often surfaces in the room as part of a discussion.

Frequently, I have noticed that somehow in those moments a memory is triggered – a storyline, a poem or a quote and I just quietly reach for the book, to share it with the group.

And without fail, at some point, perhaps during a break, after a reflective exercise, or on the way out the door, someone wanders up to me, half-whispering the same familiar question:

“Can I have a look at your books?”

There’s something lovely about that moment.

It’s a reminder that learning is magnetic.

People are drawn to ideas, stories, and tools that promise to help them become a little more than they were yesterday.

The books aren’t there to impress.

They’re there as a silent, open invitation.

A gentle nudge that says: There’s always more to uncover. More to question. More to grow into.

And perhaps that’s one of my favourite parts of facilitation, the quiet exchanges that don’t happen when I’m speaking, but when someone chooses to explore a new possibility for themselves.

Because sometimes all it takes is the right book in the right moment… placed in just the right spot.

What’s the next idea you need to explore to grow as a leader?

Bouncing Back

This week reminded me that life has a funny way of keeping us grounded… sometimes literally.
On Monday, I was present at the official launch of the brand-new Learning Centre at Aviva in Perth, and I was fortunate to co-facilitate one of the very first sessions in the new facility.
The excitement in the building was fantastic, after months of work finally came to life. New rooms, new tech, new possibilities.
Meanwhile back at home, things were a little different. My poor wife Monic took suddenly unwell that very morning. We thought it might have been something from the weekend in the Netherlands… and by the time I got home that evening with all the family together to celebrate Cristi’s birthday, I was down with it too… 🤨
A rough 24 hours, to say the least!
What we first thought was potentially food poisoning soon felt much more like a norovirus, the sort that leaves you just completely wiped out.

A little wobble…

Thankfully, a few days later I’m back on my feet, but my brilliant co-facilitator had to deliver a two-day programme on her own. Thank you, Jodi, and thanks too to the team members who stepped in to cover the latter half of the week. I’m very grateful.
It reminded me that leadership isn’t always about being the one at the front of the room.
Resilience isn’t always about pushing through. Sometimes it’s about resting when you need to, trusting others when you must, and bouncing back when you’re able.
Life brings these little wobble moments of unexpected highs, plus unexpected lows, yet each one teaches us something if we let it.
I’m simply grateful to be feeling a little better today… and grateful for the people around me who carry things forward when I can’t.
Here’s to new beginnings, good colleagues, recovering strength, and the quiet courage it takes to keep going.
I also sincerely hope I never passed the bug onto any others!
Where in your life do you need to slow down, trust someone else, or simply take a breath in order to come back stronger?

Moments That Move Us

I’ve been so focused on facilitation and delivery lately that I almost forgot how easy it is to lose track of what really moves people.

However, a recent experience reminded me of a moment in a workshop from a few years ago.

It taught me a simple truth… Thoughts shape emotions. Emotions drive action.

I recall the energy in the room was buzzing. Everyone was engaged, leaning in. Then, something shifted.

One participant, quiet until then, spoke up: “I can relate to that.”

And just like that, the tears came.

The tone changed instantly. We’d already built a space of psychological safety that day, but this moment, this raw, real moment – cut through even deeper.

The room stilled. Everyone listened.

As this person opened up, they stepped into a deeply vulnerable space. And by doing so, they pulled us in with them. In that fleeting moment, you could feel the silence, it wasn’t awkward, it felt sacred.

No one said a word.

Then it happened.

The people sitting closest reached out, not with words, but with a simple, human touch. A hand on the shoulder. A nod. A connection.

In that instant, the group wasn’t just a room of individuals.

We were one.

United.

Present.

Together.

That one moment changed the whole workshop. And I’ve carried it with me ever since.

These turning points, the ones that really teach us something meaningful, don’t come with warning signs. They show up unannounced. But when they do, welcome them. Lean in. Let them shape you.

Because those are the moments that matter.

Is there someone you can reach out to today?

Bruised, But Not Broken

It all started so promisingly.
Arriving early at Murrayfield yesterday, for the friendly rugby international, Scotland v USA on a lovely evening in Edinburgh.
Amilya, Hazel and I were excited.
The build up was loud with a DJ in action pumping up the volume.
A lot of pride was in the air with our respective national anthems – the Star-Spangled Banner and Flower of Scotland.
We were all set for the action to unfold!
I did warn my two American friends that it could be rather one sided!
It was only a few minutes before Scotland scored, then again and again and again.
By half time it was 45 – 0.
By full time it was 85 – 0, sweeping aside the USA for their biggest ever Murrayfield win.
I don’t think anybody attending the match thought Scotland were ever in any danger of losing, but the scale of Scotland’s win was impressive.
And depending on your perspective, it may feel brutal, even a little unfair.
What struck me though about the Americans was they didn’t quit!
They kept tackling, kept resetting, kept showing up.
Outmatched, yes – but not undone.
Such a humbling defeat isn’t easy for anyone to accept.
Despite the loss, it was fun watching Amilya and Hazel, they had a great time in a stadium that rocked from start to finish.

Compelled to be Humble

Sometimes we are compelled to be humble – and yesterday was one of those days for the American rugby team.
It reminded me of this verse from the Book of Mormon:
“And now, because ye are compelled to be humble, blessed are ye.” – Alma 32:13
That kind of humility, the kind we don’t choose, but are forced into, can feel a little rough.
Embarrassing, possibly even unfair.
But in a gospel sense in God’s eyes, it’s still an opening, it’s still a beginning.
Because what matters isn’t how we were humbled, rather what matters is what we choose to do next.
So, the question I’m asking myself this Sunday morning is:
When life humbles me, do I let it shape me? Or just shame me?

What’s in a Name?

As participants arrived in the room, one by one, they’re given their name tags.
At the same time, they tick their names off the participant list and registration is complete.
A few minutes later during our check in, everyone introduces themselves to the group.
But there’s one challenge that never seems to get any easier for me, even after years of practice… names!
Currently, every few days, I find myself faced with a fresh set of twenty to thirty or so new names to learn.
It’s no small task.
I’m not exactly sure why, but some are easy to remember, others take a few tries, and occasionally I’ll mix up two people completely, especially when there’s a Mark, a Matt, and a Martin in the same room!
Yesterday, the tables turned.
A couple of participants started calling me by the wrong name and not just once!
I could tell they felt a bit embarrassed when they realised, so, in the spirit of fun, I decided to join in.
When one of them said, “Thanks, Darren,” I smiled and replied, “No problem, Martin.” (His name was definitely not Martin.)
Cue a big smile and some laughter.
It broke the tension instantly.
The moment became fun and light-hearted.
Later, as we reflected on the day, I realised something simple yet powerful: learning names is an act of leadership.
It’s about presence.
It’s about seeing people.
When we take the time to remember someone’s name, we’re telling them, “You matter. You’re worth remembering.”
Getting it wrong occasionally?
That’s just part of the journey.
What matters is how we recover, with grace, humour, and a wee bit of warmth.
So, to all the participants out there.
Could you help us facilitator’s out?
If you spot us in an office somewhere, to ease the triggering of the mental panic, please say hello and quickly remind us of your name – just in case!
Leadership, at its best, is all about connection, and sometimes, connection begins with something as small as a name.
What other “small” leadership habits have a big impact on connection and belonging?
p.s. – maybe some bigger name tags may help too! 😅

Reflections from the Edge

Yesterday, I was co-facilitating a leadership session in Perth with my colleague Sophie Edmond.
Early in the session, we were talking about past leadership programmes the participants had attended.
As stories were shared, a favourite poem by Christopher Logue came to mind.
I recited it as best I could to the group and then after finding it again online, wrote it up on a flipchart…
𝑪𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒆𝒅𝒈𝒆.
We might fall.
Come to the edge.
It’s too high!
COME TO THE EDGE!
And they came,
and he pushed,
And they 𝒇𝒍𝒆𝒘.
Afterwards, I noticed a few puzzled expressions around the room.
I took some time to explain my thoughts.

From comfort to stretch zone

When asked to be a leader, it can often bring us right to the very edge of our comfort zone.
It can also challenge our capability, of what we think we can handle.
And yet, here they were, leaders from all walks of life, and different parts of the Aviva organisation, showing up with curiosity, openness, and the courage to start stretching their wings.
Yes, there was hesitation.
Yes, there was fear.
But there was also a real willingness to grow, to take risks, to learn and to move into their stretch zones.
Through my lifetime, I have learned that leadership is oftentimes about pushing past our fears.
Sometimes it’s about holding the space while others get ready.
But time and again, it’s about standing at the edge with your people… encouraging, challenging, supporting and knowing when to move forward together.
That’s what I witnessed in Perth yesterday.
Leaders on the edge.
Some nervous. Some unsure. But all leaning in.
Not just ready to learn, but ready to lead others to the edge, to fly… and beyond.
I can’t wait to be back with them all today and encourage a little more!
What are you doing and how are you helping others to find their wings?

Learning to Lead

Yesterday whilst co-facilitating the new Lead the Way leadership programme for Aviva in Perth, we got talking about our own leadership journeys for a wee while.
I shared one of my earliest stories.
In the summer of 1977, we had just moved house, and I had also just finished Primary School.
I was twelve years old.
There was lots of change going on for me and our family.
Everything felt a little unfamiliar a new place, new people, and the transition to High School ahead of me.
That summer I took on my first job, in an early morning paper round at the local newsagent.
It was easy enough, delivering newspapers in the quiet stillness before the day began.
But I didn’t just do the job; I paid attention.
I quickly learned the five different routes, how they worked, and who covered them.
Then, it wasn’t long before the newsagent began to trust me with more, including a few extra deliveries, managing new routes, then stepping in when others didn’t show.
Bit by bit, I found myself not just doing a job but being responsible for making sure it all ran smoothly.
Looking back, I see now that’s where my leadership journey quietly began.
Not with a title or a grand plan, but with trust, consistency, and a willingness to step up.
As John Maxwell said, “Leadership is not about titles, positions or flowcharts. It is about one life influencing another.”
That summer, I wasn’t thinking about leadership.
But I was learning how it starts, simply by showing up, taking responsibility, and earning trust.
That lesson has stayed with me ever since.
And as I reflect about it more this morning… maybe it began even earlier, when I was nine and made a seconder in the Cub Scouts, but that’s another story!
What about you?
What early experience taught you the value of responsibility?
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