Tag Archive for: change

A new chapter

As one chapter in life draws to a close, another is set to begin…

One morning earlier this week, I was about to head outside to post a birthday card, when our youngest daughter Cristi was also just departing for school.  I asked if I could join her on her walk to school and she agreed that I could.

All at once, memories flooded back of the many times over the last 20 years of walking to school with our children. Walking through the rain, wind, snow and sunshine have all been experiences we’ve shared together.  The days of holding each of their hands have long since gone.  Tiny steps, eventually grew into strides together.

Walking with Cristi, I recognised quickly that this was likely to be the very last time I walked with her on part of her journey to school.  Her school days are swiftly drawing to a close, with only a few days left to go.  We talked, we laughed and to be honest, I did get a little emotional. Just for a moment there was a little tear in my eye.  I realised that the school days of our children chapter of our life together, was now rapidly drawing to an end.  As we reached Dot, the lollipop lady, we wished each other well.

Our Book of Life

Like a book, life has a beginning, and end, and a lot of chapters in between that push us forward from one event to another.  Each of us will begin many new chapters in our own book of life.  Some chapters are challenging and difficult, others are fun and exciting.  Momentarily, a little bit of sentimentality also played into my own book, with this little walk for sure.  Another sweet memory was added into my own book of life.

Ultimately change happens for each of us.

Accepting change can be hard and exciting too, as we turn the page of a new chapter in life.  For us, there are a whole new set of adventures ahead, Belgium/Netherlands beckons!!

What changes and new chapters are you set to write about in your very own book of life?

The Speed of Change

Events happen that create change.

Being change agile has been critical for all of us this last year, life has changed significantly.

World War II

Cast your mind back a few generations.  At the outbreak of WWII,  the massive change of war impacted every household across the nation.  There were repercussions for everyone.

One consequence was that the UK government embarked upon a scrap drive with households all over the nation donating their iron railings and gates to the war effort. It was quite an initiative, creating a feeling of  altruistic sacrifice amongst the people of the country.  Indeed it was a feel good factor, boosting morale, we were all in this together!

The recycled iron collected was used to create steel for all kinds of uses during the war, ships, tanks, planes, tools etc.

Subsequently mile after mile of iron railings vanished from our streets.  Even after all these years, our neighbourhood still has lots of evidence to suggest that great sacrifice was made for the war effort.

Whilst out walking yesterday, we noticed that one of the larger houses in our area had new iron railings installed.  They looked great!  As we continued our walk, we observed just how many other homes in our community had never replaced the railings.  Despite the fact that 80+ years have passed by!

Somehow yesterday, the fact that one home had new iron railings, accentuated the issue, namely there were so many homes that hadn’t done anything in all those years.

So – why is that?

  • Our initial thought was perhaps people didn’t have the money to replace the railings?  Would that be the case even after 80+ years?
  • Perhaps people just aren’t interested in beautifying their homes and replacing the iron railings, its unimportant?
  • Could it be that people are just lazy and can’t be bothered?
  • Perhaps they like the little iron stubs protruding out of their walls?  – No that’s just daft we thought!
  • It could be that despite 80+ years passing, it is something that generations of homeowners have never gotten around too?
  • Maybe folks like the constant reminder that the iron stubs are an important part of the social history of the area?
  • Or after all of those ideas, could it be something completely different – that as yet we haven’t thought of?

What do we learn about the speed of change?

The speed of change at the start of WWII was incredibly fast.  The demand for steel accelerated quickly to meet the needs of the war effort.  There was a huge need, driving the change.

Post war it seems, the issue of replacement railings has only ever been addressed by a few.

There is nothing now driving the need for change.

It is simply a matter of personal motivation and a few of the factors outlined above.  The speed factor, the big event driving the change – has disappeared!  Aside from an occasional comment or passing remark, no one is driving the change.  Perhaps that it the biggest lesson of all.

What drives change in your own life and in your own community?

Curiosity

“Tell me, on a scale from 1 to 10, where are you right now?” I asked curiously…

Since my earliest childhood memories, I’ve been curious about things, people, nature, places, history, travel and culture to name a few. I have always been eager to know or learn something new and understand “why?” That probably explains one of the seemingly insatiable penchant’s of mine…..reading books!

One vivid memory from my childhood involved filling a jam jar with some foliage and then capturing a bumble bee. I’d already had some help to put some holes in the lid of the jar, so that any bee’s I captured could breath. I recall observing and listening to the bee for no more than a day, studying it, feeling sad about keeping it in a jar and then setting it free again.

Curiosity is often seen as the driving force behind not only human development, but developments in science, language, and industry. I know too that it is a vital component in coaching and mentoring

My experience is that questions driven by the curiosity of a coach can be the catalyst and driving force for change. I have come to understand that curiosity is the key to learning. It can help to expand our empathy too by helping us understand life experiences different than our own.

What are you curious about?

My world has turned upside down

In the last 12 months my work has literally turned upside down. Let me explain.
I’ve just submitted my year end financial records to my accountant (👋🏻 Lauren – Hello Accountancy- she is great by the way) for the creation of my annual 20-21 management accounts. But I noticed some startling facts I’d like to share.
As an executive coach, facilitator and leadership trainer, my business model is simple. I have several associate relationships and direct clients of my own – thanks everyone! I travel around the UK, Europe and occasionally further afield, meeting lots of people and amass rewards points staying in hotels! Oh, and I love what I do!
Then the pandemic hit.
On 23rd March 2020, with the exception of 1 virtual delivery, my entire face to face workload disappeared overnight.
Now what I thought?
Quickly, with speed and agility, I changed my business model. I upskilled on a wide range of virtual platforms and work mostly from home.
Here are the startling facts on revenues which have remained similar….
  • 2019-2020 – 95% of my revenue is face to face, with 5% virtual.
  • 2020-2021 – 95% of my revenue is virtual, with 5% face to face.
My 100,000+ annual hotel points are now zero and my travel is mostly gone.  I haven’t been on a plane for over a year.
There have been a few other challenges along the way, but I recognise that I am very fortunate too.
How have you had to adapt? How has your world changed?

Milestones

The last few weeks, several milestone birthdays have popped up on my social media alerts. 18, 21, 30, 40, 50, 60, 70 & 80 years old.

A milestone usually indicates a significant event in your life, that marks a momentous change of some sort. I have noticed that these milestone events can consequently impact upon us in all kinds of meaningful, exciting and challenging ways!

For starters, photos, videos, congratulations are shared ten fold, with a few embarrassing ones thrown in for good measure! From, my observations however, it has also seemed to stop a few friends in their tracks, as individually they seriously consider just what really matters most of all. Perhaps even more so for those who are hitting the higher numbers now!

I remember when I hit the big 50 a few years back. All of a sudden I became acutely aware of my mortality! I figured out in respect to time that I had much less to go on the earth, than I had already had! It is strange how that put things into perspective for me. Yes #timeflies!

What #milestones are approaching on the horizon for you?

And as the wings of time flutter on by, “Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life”? – Mary Oliver

Small steps everyday

Stuck in a rut? Feeling a bit flat? Every day just feels the same? Not getting anywhere? Is it Thursday or Friday? Life feels dull & boring?

I’m certain many of us are feeling like that right now. I know, because its been confirmed in many recent coaching conversations!

Yesterday, whilst out on a walk with my daughter, trudging laboriously through the snow to Tesco (a highlight of the day), the underfoot conditions made it very difficult just to even put one foot in front of another at times. Yes, it can be tough! Yet, small steps helped.

So, what can we do about it?

I know there is a great power in establishing good 𝐡𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐬 and 𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬. However, right now lets change things around a bit!

There is great power in the old phrase “𝐯𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐭𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞.”

Start by looking for ways to add different experiences to your day and take that first small step and then a few more.

Make some new plans, have some fun, help others, try something new, be spontaneous, call friends, take that walk, volunteer, exercise, journal! Above all – take action! Go and do!

What variety of ideas have you tried recently?

Take a few small steps today!

Expect the unexpected!

The unprecedented, unexpected, exceptional and unimaginable are the new norm. “When you look to the future in leadership, what must change, what do you see?” asked a course participant.
This is a huge question.
The world is rapidly changing at lightning speed.
Reflecting for a moment and considering all that is going on in the world my response was a simple one… “even more disruption and expect the unexpected. I believe that the key to future success for any leader will be self-awareness, purpose, authenticity, empathy, humility and knowing exactly what they want to become.”
As the world continues to spiral from one crisis to another, the question I am often asked is “what should we be teaching leaders now?”
Considering the unfolding events on the world stage in the last few days, I was drawn to an article by Boyd Matheson who stated that “setting personal interest aside to contemplate the greater good is the essence of leadership. Far too many leaders are obsessed with a different question “What is best for me?”” Instead, the true leader faced with momentous decisions asks “What is best for the people I lead?”
Consider your families, teams, and organisations today…”What is best for the people you lead?”

Outgrown something?

What are the tell tale signs, when you know you have outgrown something?

Bored, unhappy, in the doldrums, not learning anything, its not fun anymore, it just doesn’t feel right, you’re coasting, you’re faultfinding, frustrations are rising, constantly checking for alternatives, there is no stretch anymore, you feel way too comfortable, there is little satisfaction, time just seems to drag, you’re not engaged…Inside you just know its time to move on and change.

All of the above? Some of the above?

Sounds or feels familiar? The signs are clear?

As a coach, I have listened to this tale on numerous occasions. In fact, I have lost count how many times.

So – what now?

Firstly, give it some real thought, ponder, reflect and revisit your goals – what do you want from life?

Secondly, speak to someone you trust. A partner, your boss, a colleague, a friend, perhaps even a coach. Share your thoughts, keep an open mind and explore opportunities together.

Outgrowing things happen. Listen to your intuition – you’ll know!

Determination

And then it changed.

In our virtual session, all of the participants were viewing images representing different experiences or emotions connected with 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞. Each participant was to select an image that really resonated with them personally.

I asked the session producer to select one of the many images and asked participants to identify themselves if they had selected that specific image. The producer randomly chose one of those participants… and then it began.

The image chosen – 𝐝𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧.

I asked the participant why this image resonated with her. She then shared a portion of her life story that had been filled with adversity, physical challenge and major setbacks. Yet there was a determination not to let those setbacks get in the way of her own ambitions. In that moment, we all listened intently, in wonder and awe – each of us touched by her emotional testimony. I’ve tried hard to imagine what her life may have been like.

No matter whatever life had thrown at her, she chose to carry on enjoying the challenge of life with optimism, a positive outlook and a gritty determination.

Resilience is a choice, we can all develop much more.

What is your reaction in the face of adversity?

Small things

“Let’s see how far you can reach” said the optician. As it turned out, not very far! “Okay, let’s see if I can help” he continued.

I knew my eyesight had deteriorated and it had been well over 2 years since my last test. Lockdown had delayed my test even further, plus I was now spending so much more time behind a laptop screen every day, I was sure that wasn’t helping.

So the optician went to work by trying lots of different lenses, tweaking them a little here and there. It seemed complex to me, but it was obviously simple for him. Every now and again he’d asked me to read the chart again, and little by little, my sight improved, until finally he said “that’s you now with 20/20 vision.”

What a difference, as I was able to read down to the smallest of the letters on the chart.

My vision changed.

By small and simple things, great things happen.

The world has been turned upside down.

Just like the optician helped restore my 20/20 vision, what small and simple things can you do to help someone in need, at home, at work or in your community?