Healing Hurts

After breaking my collar bone last Wednesday (see picture), the last few days, I’ve discovered a little about physical aches, discomfort and pain.
However, it is not only me that is hurting.
Not only can we suffer physical discomfort and pain, sometimes thoughtless, insensitive, blunt, or inconsiderate remarks can hurt feelings too.
Look around, there isn’t likely to be anyone who hasn’t been hurt and there isn’t likely to be one of us, who hasn’t hurt others.
At times, we may not even be aware of our careless remarks or comments.
Regretfully, I know I have made some insensitive comments at times.
Every day someone is hurting.
I am aware that as each day has gone by, I have started to heal.
However, it requires time, work, action, and energy too.
I’ve experienced that healing also hurts, just like a broken collar bone needs time to heal and repair itself.
I wear a sling and take paracetamol to help ease the pain.
Are you brooding over something?
Have your feelings been hurt by someone or perhaps you have made some poor decisions recently and you are sore?
As in the healing process of my broken collar bone, so injured feelings or hurts of the heart, can only be healed, when we choose not to nurse them too long, by taking prescribed medications – whatever those may be, and in time get ourselves up and about.
The timeline of healing is different for everyone, one day at a time.
Its also full of many ups and downs.
Healing happens through the process of living and taking action.
Look out for someone on your path today who is afraid, hurting, or in need of a friend.
Why not reach out to help them heal.

People May Wonder

– What is the purpose of life?
– Where did I come from?
– Is there a God who cares about me?
– How can I feel that He cares?
– How can I believe in God when so many bad things happen?
– Why is life so hard sometimes?
– How can I find strength during these times?
– How can I become a better person?
– What happens after I die?
𝑯𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒘𝒐𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒅?
All of these questions and more are answered in the second lesson taught by our missionaries in “Heavenly Father’s Plan of Salvation”
Why not speak to one of the many missionaries of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, today.
Answers are only a conversation away.

Ministering

After breaking my collar bone last Wednesday, it’s been an unusual few days for me.
Things have changed, dramatically.
I am unable to do even the simplest of things for myself.
I’ve felt a little wobbly at times and encountered a few stumbling blocks along the way.
Discomfort and pain are frequent visitors.
Some challenges include taking a shower, getting dressed/undressed, getting up off the couch, and even tying my shoelaces.
Things have been a little frustrating, as I’ve been forced to slow down.
Even typing this short message, takes a lot longer, one key stroke at a time, using only my right hand.
Monic and a few others have come to my rescue.
At times, I have literally had to lean on them.
They have been on hand to minister to me.
To minister means to love and care for others and to do the kinds of things the Saviour would do if He were living among us today.
Ministering is a way to help others feel Heavenly Father’s love and meet their spiritual and temporal needs.
These last few days, I feel blessed as others have supported and helped me with this new challenge.
I have felt their love.
Jean B. Bingham said, “Sometimes we think we have to do something grand and heroic to ‘count’ as serving our neighbours. Yet simple acts of service can have profound effects on others—as well as on ourselves.”
I am a witness that Christlike ministering takes place in the small, sincere acts, others do every day.
I am so grateful for all those who minister.
I love and appreciate each of you.
Look around at your family and friends, how can you minister to them as the Saviour would?

My Best Thinking

Frequently our minds are at warp speed, with a jumbled clutter of thoughts that seem more disorganised than inspiring.
In those moments it can be difficult to do any thinking at all!
My “best thinking” however, seems to occur when my mind is somewhat relaxed and quiet.
Time seems to slow a little and I can sit quietly and just think.
A quiet spot, with no interruptions is the best place for me.
It’s my place, where I find peace and quiet time to think.

Three Places

I have three favourite places where I do my best thinking.
Firstly, sat in the living room, on the couch, pondering, reflecting, and studying.
Secondly, often I am awakened in the middle of the night when it is dark and quiet. One or two words come to mind, followed by a flow of inspiration. I arise from bed and capture the thoughts that follow in my journal or on a notepad.
Thirdly, in the shower. The warm water seems to increase the flow of dopamine to my brain and physically relaxes my body, which allows my inner thoughts to really shine. There has been a lot of research done on this and it is actually known as the “shower effect”.

Timing

Interestingly, all of my best thinking also happens in the early hours of the morning.
Its in those wee small hours, when I’m not focused on an issue that I’m concerned about, that answers usually always come.
It is the time when my most meaningful ideas arise.
“In the hustle of the marketplace there is money to be made but under the cherry tree there is rest” – Ruskin Bond.
Wherever you go and whenever you take time to think, perhaps the most important thing is to actually slow down and make some time just for thinking.
It is my experience that ideas don’t just happen in certain places, they happen at certain times, too.
When and where do you do your best thinking?

The Gift of Weeping

There are many spiritual gifts.
Gift: a notable capacity, talent, or endowment
Weeping is a gift that a few of us have been given.
It is precious.
In missionary interviews, tears are a frequent visitor.
Tissues are always on hand.
Life has taught me that weeping arises from the heart, signifying an open and softened heart.
Tears enable us to get in touch with our deepest feelings.
They are an outward manifestation of our innermost emotions.
They come from deep within.
They can’t be forced.
Some people cry so often, they are known for their tears.
Sometimes others see tears as an embarrassment and weeping as a sign of weakness.

In scripture

Yet, through faith, some of the most loving and compassionate words in scripture are these:
“Jesus wept” – John 11:35
“…. Behold, how he loved him!” – John 11:36
I understand why God weeps.
Tears are a gift of grace from God.
In interviews, tears remind us of mission life on a deeper, more authentic, and soulful level.
Very often they are a sign of empathy, compassion, and vulnerability.
They are tender, sensitive, and can help others move from burdens to blessings.

Our Hearts

My heart has often beat in empathy with other hearts, gently weeping in unison.
Thank you for the privilege to sit with you and listen.
Being easily moved to tears, crying for, or with others, is indeed a beautiful gift.
Watch what happens the next time someone weeps in your presence.
Be with and pay respectful attention to them.
Hand them a tissue.
Weeping can cleanse our souls.
There is strength and a sacredness in tears.
Their fruit is always, ultimately… joy.
How can you help wipe away others tears?

Work in Progress

Are you satisfied with where you are now?
Preparing for the day ahead, it struck me that I’m a work in progress.
Later this morning, I’ll be working with missionaries to help each one of them to become a better missionary… I guess, a few, like me who are also, a work in progress.
Deep down I think we may all see ourselves as a work in progress, whether we admit it to ourselves or not.
Isn’t each of us a work in progress in the hands of God?
Progress means moving forward even when we encounter difficulty along the way.
I’m allowing myself to be a work in progress.
And you can, too.
How are you a work in progress?

Dialogue

It was an afterthought.
Leaving for the office yesterday afternoon, I nipped back upstairs and picked up my box of CCS cards.

The Task

Later, as I started the meeting, I asked each participant to consider a question and then select three cards they regarded to be an answer to the question I posed.
Each participant was holding an identical pack of cards, with the same photographs, illustrations, and words.
Attentively, I watched as each member of the council started to thumb through the deck and select some images that captured their personal point of view.
I smiled, as I watched their faces light up, obviously amused as they shared and compared images with one another, they’d found interesting.
I was struck by their concentration, and evident delight in finding suitable cards that meant something to them in answer to the question I’d asked.

Sharing

Then, after some time, in our safe space, it was time to share.
I explained a little and observed again.
Quietly, deeply, respectfully, each person asked themselves “what is it that I most want to communicate”?
Randomly, one by one, each person articulated their thoughts with great depth of clarity and understanding, allowing them to speak about what was in their hearts and minds.
The personal insights shared were powerful and thought provoking.
Each participant said something that was true for them and everyone else respectfully listened.
It was clear as participants felt safe to share their half-formed ideas, and discover new meanings in a simple image, the energy in the room began to gather, and the atmosphere started to deepen for the dialogue that followed.

Outcomes

The purpose of the simple activity was to help participants to uncover and talk about their thoughts on the given subject.
Instead of getting down to business straight away as normal, it was just really nice to pause, talk and meet together as fellow human beings, by engaging in a meaningful conversation in a fun way.
It has been my experience as a facilitator, that saying something in a friendly, respectful, and informal way, early in a gathering, can set a pattern of full participation that can help maintain energy levels throughout any meeting.
Setting the scene yesterday, opened up a new way to ensure authentic dialogue throughout our meeting together, where crucially we really listened to one another.
How do you ensure authentic dialogue in your meetings?

Sleep

“President why are you always up so early?” – is a question I am asked every week by one of the missionaries.
My answer usually goes something like this…
“It’s a habit! Ever since I was 11 years old, when I started an early morning newspaper round, I’ve been up before 5.00am.”
However, it’s actually a little more than that…
I’m a bit of a geek when it comes to sleep. I’ve studied it for a while and read several books on the matter.
Some terms I have become familiar with are owls, doves, larks, inbetweeners, circadian rhythms etc.
Have you considered your chronotype? What’s that I hear you say?
In short it describes you sleeping characteristics.
“Chronotype is the natural inclination of your body to sleep at a certain time, or what most people understand as being an early bird versus a night owl. In addition to regulating sleep and wake times, chronotype has an influence on appetite, exercise, and core body temperature. It is responsible for the fact that you feel more alert at certain periods of the day and sleepier at others.” – The Sleep Foundation.
There are four types of chronotype, Lion, Bear, Wolf, Dolphin.
A google search will help you find an online quiz that will confirm your type for you.
• Lion: The lion chronotype stands in for the early bird. These individuals wake up early and are most productive in the morning but may have more trouble following a social schedule in the evenings.
• Bear: The bear chronotype makes up about 55% of the population. People with this intermediate chronotype tend to follow the sun. They do well with traditional office hours but also have no problem maintaining a social life in the evenings.
• Wolf: The wolf chronotype is equivalent to the classic night owl, and is believed to make up approximately 15% of the population.
• Dolphin: The dolphin chronotype is based on the ability of real dolphins to stay alert even while sleeping. Human “dolphins” are best described as insomniacs.
I am most definitely a lion!
There are several good books to read on sleep, including “Sleep” by Nick Littlehales. Or “The Sleep Revolution” by Arianna Huffington.
Top tips.
1 – For me take a nap!
2. Is to find a new place for your smartphone to charge. Put is as far away from your bed as you can.
What type are you?

Change Your Life

Earlier this week at FSY, I used one of my favourite icebreaker activities; “A conversation with a time traveller”.
It goes something like this…
In pairs, one participant plays someone from the early 1600’s and gets into character/mindset.
The other participant selects a modern-day object/something from our day and explains it to the individual posing as someone from the 1600’s.
I suggest they try and explain any of the following:
– A carry out pizza
– A Smartphone
– The Cinema
– Disneyland
– Netflix
As participants get into character, the results are always fun and insightful.
Participants switch roles and repeat.
There were lot of smiles, laughter, and bewildered faces on show.
Followed by a realisation that times, things, and people have 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒆𝒅 – substantially!
There is nothing so unchanging, so inevitable as change itself.
Everything around us seems to be changing at an accelerated pace.
Most changes in the world seem beyond our control.
Yet, you can 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞.

You can change your life…

Each of us have the power to change our lives.
“Every effort to change we make—no matter how tiny it seems to us—just might make the biggest difference in our lives.” – Michael A. Dunn
You can be a little better.
You can stand a little taller.
You can love a little deeper.
You can pick a different path.
You can walk a different walk.
You can find forgiveness.
And joy.
You can become your best you.
Because He gave His life, you can change yours.
I have experienced change first-hand through the actions I’ve taken.
As I have relied on Jesus Christ, He has helped bring true joy into my life.
He can and will for you too.

Pause

On Tuesday morning, I was sat with my other co-facilitators at the back of a very large hall, filled with 150 or so teenagers (13 – 18-year-olds).
Together, we listened attentively to the opening remarks, the first devotional message and the plans for the day.
Unexpectedly, all of the facilitators were asked to come to the stage and introduce themselves and their workshops.
One by one, each facilitator introduced themselves and their workshop topic.
Finally, the announcer looked towards me and my co-facilitators.
I took a breath and slowed down.
I 𝐩𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐝.
There was a polite round of applause.
Then, I made a gesture by raising my arms.
The result, the applause got louder.
I raised my arms a little further and the noise went up another notch or two.
Lowering my arms, the applause subsided.
I hadn’t uttered a word, and yet had already managed to gain the attention of the 150 kids in the room.
Most people find it hard to pause at all.
It’s fascinating working with young people.
Top Tip – Get their attention with some noise, then freeze and be quiet for a moment, nonverbally signalling that you have something to say.
Pausing is not a moment of “nothing”. Rather, it is a tool that can help us to build a connection, to engage with the audience, and grabs attention, whether emotionally or intellectually.
Pausing is not as easy as it sounds.
In my experience, pausing helps to convey a message more effectively.
It also allows you to collect your thoughts and allows your audience to follow what you’re saying.
Never underestimate the power of a pause.
“The right word may be effective, but nothing is as effective as a well-timed pause.” – Mark Twain
Why not consider using the power of a pause in your next lesson or presentation.