Tag Archive for: coaching

Making Metamorphosis Stick

Graduating from university many years ago, literally changed the direction of my life.
I recall attending one of a myriad of careers fairs, where numerous companies visited the university and talked about job opportunities.
One company in particular “Metamorphose” sourced and developed graduates for sales positions and after enduring an intensive selection process, I was offered my first graduate sales role with a major company.
Over the course of the next year Metamorphose were set to fine tune my sales skills through a series of training seminars and inspirational leadership events.
During each session and the subsequent year-long follow up, the big idea was to transfer some of the greatest sales skills and ideas into our daily conduct and routines.
To make it “sticky” enough to make a real difference in our sales abilities, our effectiveness and ultimately the results that we achieved.
In essence it was important for Metamorphose that their training manifested itself in the personality, conduct and performance of each graduate student.
The training certainly was first class and to this day, I still use their materials and powerful techniques.
Sadly however, along the way, there were many who failed.

Adaptation

In life, I’ve discovered that there are many who can hear a great message and not be deeply stirred – we are all different after all.
Yet others, have the ability to take ideas successfully through the early stages of their metamorphosis to where they become ingrained habits that drive long-term success.
The difference often lies in commitment, mindset, and the willingness to apply what is learned consistently.
I saw first-hand how some graduates thrived, seizing every opportunity to refine their skills, while others struggled to implement the lessons.
The most successful individuals were those who embraced continuous learning, adapted to challenges, and stayed persistent even when results were slow to appear.
An effective way to make learning “sticky” is through constant practice, by applying new skills in real-world scenarios until they become second nature.
Another is by repetition, revisiting key concepts over and over to reinforce retention.
For me, coaching and mentoring others has proven to be the best “sticky” method of all.
Looking back, I realise how much of that early training has shaped my approach to business and personal growth today.
What’s one lesson from your early career that has stayed with you?

Bee-Inspired

Last night, I had the chance to meet up with some dear friends and fellow coaches, Philip Atkinson and Dave Kesby.
I joined with many other guests for the launch of Philip’s leadership book “Bee Wise” at the Royal Over-Seas League in London.
Philip is not only a remarkable Organisational Coach, but he is also a beekeeper and an accomplished one at that.
In his book he “lifts the lid on what happens inside a hard-working hive and uses this as a refreshing metaphor to examine working life.”
In essence, “the beehive is the ultimate business case of complex organisations and working life today.”
Philip gifted me a limited-edition hard copy of his book around Christmas time, and I’ve loved perusing it ever since.
The book considers twelve key topics relevant for leadership in organisations today, including change, communication, continuous learning, decision making, diversity, purpose, productivity, teamwork and many more, all through the fascinating metaphor of an industrious beehive.
I’ve discovered a few favourite chapters and understand a little more about the life of bees, and the lessons they can teach us.
Dave was one of 12 guest writers who Philip partnered with to share additional or alternative views, helping to create a community of shared thinking or in other words some hive-logic!
Last night was not just about celebrating the launch of a book; it was about celebrating friendship, shared learning, and the power of collaboration.
Spending time with Philip, Dave, and so many like-minded professionals reminded me of the importance of community and the strength we find in exchanging ideas.
Philip’s ability to weave wisdom and leadership lessons from the natural world into our working lives is truly inspiring.
I wish you every success Philip with “Bee Wise” – may it continue to spark meaningful conversations and insightful reflections in organisations far and wide!
And to all those who have yet to pick up a copy, I wholeheartedly encourage you to dive in and discover the buzz for yourselves! 🐝
Bees thrive on teamwork; just as great leaders foster collaboration – I have a free limited edition signed hard copy to give away!
Tag a colleague, mentor, or friend who embodies the spirit of teamwork and share why they inspire you below.
I’ll pick a winner and send the signed copy to one lucky participant!

The keyboard cat

Since returning home a few months ago, we’ve inherited our daughter Cristi’s cat, while she completes her university studies in Edinburgh.
It’s been quite an adjustment for me, as I am definitely not much of a cat lover.
This week, the cat (Blue) has taken an extra special liking to my office for some reason.
A couple of days ago, he decided to perch himself – quite disruptively, right in front of me on my keyboard!
Admittedly, I became annoyed, and a little frustrated by Blue, as I had things to do!
Reflecting upon that moment, I realised that there was a lesson to be had from this persistent feline, about personal development: how we respond to disruption, can shape our growth.
And since coming home – we have experienced a lot of disruption!
In coaching, I encourage clients to reframe their challenges and look at things from a different perspective.
Disruptions, just like Blue sprawled across my keyboard, can seem like an obstacle.
Yet, they present an unexpected opportunity to pause, reassess, and refocus.
Instead of getting annoyed, I asked myself: What’s the lesson here?
Blue reminded me (again) that life rarely goes as planned, and sometimes the best response is to simply adapt with patience and creativity.
Blue, indifferent to my to-do list, brought me back to the moment.
He reminded me to slow down, breathe, and appreciate the present, even if it wasn’t the one I had planned.
Life often brings unexpected interruptions.
When we embrace them, stay present, and set healthy boundaries, we can create space for growth.
So, when life places a “cat” on your keyboard, pause, reflect, and adapt.
You might discover a lesson you didn’t know you needed.
What unexpected “disruption” in your life has taught you a valuable lesson?

Treading Water?

Returning home a few months ago has been an opportunity for lots of deep reflection, causing me to review a couple of key questions.
What do the next ten years look like?
Where am I really heading before retirement?
Recently, I was in a deep conversation with a dear friend.
He mentioned a phrase that really resonated with me.
He said “It sounds like you are just 𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫…”
I discovered the phrase has a couple of meanings.
Firstly, it means “to float vertically in the water by moving the legs and the arms up and down.”
It’s a survival skill and it’s definitely not sustainable for too long.
Secondly, “not to be advancing in any way” suggesting lots of continuous effort, yet with little forward momentum.
In essence, its lots of hard work, expending energy, yet, remaining static and I could relate to that.
Have you found yourself in this sort of space before, hoping that you are doing all the right things, but not feeling any progress?
Does it look like this?
• 𝑹𝒐𝒖𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒆 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒈𝒓𝒐𝒘𝒕𝒉 – Feeling like every day is similar to the last, with no real forward movement.
• 𝑬𝒇𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒕 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒄𝒍𝒂𝒓𝒊𝒕𝒚 – Working hard but unsure whether it’s leading anywhere meaningful.
• 𝑪𝒐𝒎𝒎𝒊𝒕𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒔 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒇𝒖𝒍𝒇𝒊𝒍𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕 – Engaged in things, yet wondering if the time and energy is truly well spent.
So, what can you do when you sense you’re treading water?
1. 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐑𝐡𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐦 – Instead of just keeping things going, consider new ways of thinking, working, or living.
2. 𝐒𝐞𝐭 𝐚 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 – It’s hard to measure progress, if you don’t have a clear direction. So, what does real movement look like for you?
3. 𝐅𝐨𝐜𝐮𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐝𝐞𝐩𝐭𝐡, 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 – Sometimes, we need to dive deeper rather than push harder. Learning, reflection, and seeking inspiration can unlock new paths.
4. 𝐓𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐬 – Not all movement is visible, I’ve learned to be patient. Some seasons prepare us quietly for what’s next.
If you feel like you’re treading water, ask yourself: 𝑰𝒔 𝒊𝒕 𝒕𝒊𝒎𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒘𝒊𝒎 𝒊𝒏 𝒂 𝒏𝒆𝒘 𝒅𝒊𝒓𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏?
The answer might just change everything…

Scheduling with Heart

I enjoy a large network of people, including coaching & business clients, colleagues, and many friends all around the world.
Subsequently, my calendar is always buzzing with something!
Scheduling, it seems, is a constant daily ritual for me.
I’m always Juggling time zones, priorities, and opportunities to maintain my meaningful and important connections.
Yet, there’s one thing I’m determined to keep old-school: 𝑰 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒓𝒐𝒍 𝒎𝒚 𝒄𝒂𝒍𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒂𝒓!
While automated scheduling tools are all the rage these days, I prefer a much more personal touch.
I always seem to have competing priorities, yet for me, every meeting is unique, and I like the flexibility to decide when and where I meet someone.
Plus, I am constantly aware of Monic’s calendar too.
It’s not about efficiency, it’s more about intention.
Here are a few of my own tips for managing your schedule with heart:
1. 𝐂𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐛𝐮𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫 𝐳𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬: I try hard never to pack my day back-to-back. Allowing breathing spaces between calls are golden and absolutely essential.
2. 𝐑𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐳𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬: Connecting across the globe requires some care. A little planning can turn a logistical headache into a pleasant experience.
3. 𝐔𝐬𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 “𝐲𝐞𝐬” 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐲: It’s often tempting to say yes to every meeting, but clarity on priorities helps me keep my calendar purposeful.
4. 𝐒𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞 “𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡-𝐮𝐩” 𝐬𝐥𝐨𝐭𝐬: I block out times specifically for reconnecting with friends and colleagues, which really helps to keep key relationships thriving!
Scheduling isn’t just logistics; for me it’s also about relationships.
Whether it’s a coaching session or a catch-up call, each meeting represents an opportunity to connect.
How do you manage your calendar?
Are you a fan of online schedulers, or do you prefer a more hands-on approach?
I’d love to hear your stories, tips, or even some of those scheduling mishaps!

Lines that define

Recently whilst working with a business client, we explored the concept of personal boundaries or the red lines we draw for ourselves and are unwilling to cross, even in the most difficult of situations.
The values that define our boundaries protect our well-being and even guide our decisions.
Boundaries can often reflect our deepest principles and non-negotiables.
They shape how we interact with others and help us navigate the challenges we face.
To bring this to life, we engaged in a few activities about boundaries.
We’d already created a psychologically safe space for everyone to share in our learning session.
Participants were asked to visualise a scenario where their boundaries had been tested, a moment when they felt uneasy, conflicted, or even compromised.
They were then invited to reflect: where did they draw the line?
Many chose to share their experiences openly with the group.
Did they stand firm, or did they allow others to cross that line?
The conversations that followed were eye-opening.
People shared how recognising and honouring their boundaries had empowered them, strengthened relationships, and brought clarity in difficult situations.
Others admitted how, at times, they had failed to assert their limits, leading to regret or frustration.
Understanding your own boundaries requires courage, self-awareness, and sometimes, a willingness to say “no.”
So, where do you draw the line?
How do your boundaries reflect who you are and what you stand for?
And, most importantly, how do you ensure those boundaries are respected?

Are you following me?

My dear friend, Paul and I have a few things in common…
We were both born and raised in Dunfermline.
We both got married to someone from abroad.
We both have three children.
We both work in learning and development.
We both served in the England London Mission of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints 
We both served as Bishop of the Dunfermline Ward.
We both served as President of the Dundee Scotland Stake, me 2005 – 2014 and Paul currently.

Chance Encounters

And if the last few Saturday mornings are anything to go by, we both enjoy walking to fulfil our church Ministering assignments at the very same time!
As we’ve crossed paths in virtually the same spot these last few weeks, it’s become a bit of a running joke.
“𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒂𝒈𝒂𝒊𝒏? 𝑨𝒓𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒇𝒐𝒍𝒍𝒐𝒘𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒎𝒆, 𝒐𝒓 𝒂𝒎 𝑰 𝒇𝒐𝒍𝒍𝒐𝒘𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒚𝒐𝒖?”
These chance encounters have added a touch of humour and a smile to our faces in our shared commitment to serve others.
Whilst he is heading north, I am heading south!
Ministering has always held a special place in both of our hearts.
There’s something deeply rewarding about reaching out to others, offering a listening ear, a kind word, or simply letting someone know they’re remembered and loved.
It’s not just a duty; it’s a privilege – a way to follow the Saviour’s example of service and compassion.
We both share a passion for this work.
Even now, as it is his turn to carry the mantle of Stake President, his dedication to these simple but significant acts of care is inspiring.
We both know that real joy in ministering comes not from grand gestures, but from consistent, small acts of love and service.
And yet, life has a way of adding a touch of humour to even the most heartfelt endeavours.
It’s a light-hearted reminder that ministering doesn’t have to be stiff or overly formal, it’s about connection, warmth, and even a good laugh along the way.
As I reflect on these moments, I feel a deep sense of gratitude for Paul, for his leadership, friendship, and example.
Serving alongside him in this way reminds me that ministering is more than a responsibility; it’s a joyful journey we share together, one visit at a time.
What small acts of love and service have brought a smile to your face lately?

Faith at Work

Yesterday, I enjoyed catching up with some old colleagues and making some new friends in a virtual café for Fellows of the Association for Coaching.
There was an instant blend of warmth, trust, and camaraderie.
Our shared values and collective openness allowed us to learn and grow together.
The smiles, the attentive nods, the laughter, and the genuine curious interest in one another’s thoughts created a strong sense of belonging.
Some topics for our breakout rooms were suggested and off we went to share our thoughts.
I suggested a current topic at the forefront of my mind “faith friendly workplaces”.
What followed in the next 35 minutes was one of the most insightful and powerful coaching conversations I’ve ever had.
I am truly thankful for Tom Hennessy for his intuitive and penetrating questioning skills.
From the outset, he tuned into my thinking as I shared my experiences of an event I’d attended the day before.

Religious Freedom

At that event, I’d engaged with a diverse group of leaders, advocates, and thinkers who were passionate about the intersection of religious freedom and business.
Hosted by Louise Bailey of OVO, the gathering highlighted the vital role that workplaces play in fostering an environment where faith can be expressed openly and respectfully.
Brian J. Grim of the Religious Freedom and Business Foundation, shared his perspective on how recognising and respecting employees’ faith identities can enrich any workplace culture.
His stories underscored the importance of seeing faith as an integral part of diversity, just as important as race, gender, or any other characteristic.
The event also reminded me that creating faith-friendly workplaces wasn’t just about accommodating faith; it’s about empowering individuals to bring their whole selves to work.
Further, it’s about creating an environment where people feel seen, heard, and valued, not despite their faith but because of the richness it adds to who they are.
As I further reflected upon the conversations at the event, I realised how closely they align with the work I’m passionate about.
Coaching, after all, is about creating safe spaces for people to explore and grow.
If workplaces can become those safe spaces, where faith is acknowledged and respected, it could transform not just individual lives but entire organisational cultures.
Now, I have my work cut out as I consider how to bring my learning and coaching knowledge to this vital cause.
How can we foster workplaces that embrace faith as part of diversity?
It’s a challenge I’m eager to explore, and one I invite you to consider too.

 

We Are Our Thoughts

Our thoughts are incredibly powerful.
They affect us in many ways – our mood, our behaviours and our outlook on life.
I’ve always loved the scripture in Proverbs 23:7, “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he…”
Recently I have been paying much more attention to the things I am thinking every day.
I consider whether my thoughts are positive, negative or even neutral.
…Apply the proverb to real life…
If my thoughts are filled with positivity, then so I will be.
…with negativity, then so I will be.
We literally become our thoughts.
We 𝒂𝒓𝒆 our thoughts.
In short – I am learning again that the quality of my thoughts has a direct impact on the quality of my life.
I love this quote by Dr. Wayne Dyer: “If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change”
Subsequently, if you want to have a more meaningful and purposeful life, then begin to pay more attention to the things you think about every day.
Start by considering the things you tell yourself every day.
For example, are you struggling with someone?
A spouse, partner, a sibling, parents, a friend, or a workmate perhaps?
Pause for a moment and stop yourself.
Watch your thoughts…
Do you see what is happening in that moment?
What do you think about in your heart, when you think of them?
What do you notice?
Are your thoughts negative or positive?
If its negative, challenge yourself, and your thinking.
For me those challenges start early in the morning, when I make plans for the day ahead.
Start by engaging new positive thoughts and watch them start to grow day by day.
See how it feels.
I am relearning that when we change your thoughts, you can change your life, one thought at a time.
What would happen if you took just one thought today and intentionally shifted it from negative to positive?

Looking Back

“You’re looking well Dave” I said.
“And you too Daryl” he replied.
And so began our lovely lunch with one another, earlier this week in Stirling.
Dave and I were colleagues many years ago, collaborating on numerous large-scale, challenging projects during our time working together.
Lunch was delicious.
We got caught up on our family situations.
And we talked about what we were doing now.
But what we really enjoyed was taking time to reflect upon our many experiences we’d share together, twenty plus years ago.
Looking back allowed us to revisit past experiences with the clarity of hindsight.

New Insights

As we shared our thoughts and feelings, we found they often revealed insights that we’d missed in the moment, from many years ago.
Indeed, we found looking back useful, because it gave us both a new perspective.
Revisiting those moments with Dave added another layer of richness, as his perspective shed light on details I’d never considered.
Part of enjoying life lies in celebrating our accomplishments and milestones, and there were certainly plenty of those during the time Dave and I worked side by side.
Whilst reflecting on some of those daunting challenges we faced together, our shared response was, “I’d never thought about it quite like that before.”
Looking back isn’t just about nostalgia—it’s an opportunity for growth.
We both recognised how far we’d come and understood a little better how the many challenges we’d faced together had shaped us, and to some extent, influenced our future decisions.
There is something very powerful about reflecting on the past together.
We both realised how much we’d influenced each other; in ways we’d never considered.
Looking back certainly helped us to understand how our past experiences had shaped us, but somehow it also helped us to look ahead to the future with renewed confidence.
It was a real joy to strengthen our bonds of friendship, celebrate our successes and gain a deeper empathy for and understanding of each other – after far, far too long!
Thanks Dave – and I’ll pay next time!
When you look back on where you’ve been, how does it shape the way you see your path ahead?