Swimming Lessons

Yesterday, I returned to the swimming pool. It’s been a while! Today, getting out of bed, I’ve learned another lesson…..pacing myself!

This morning, I’m aching all over. In my enthusiasm of being back in the water, it feels that I have simply stretched myself just a little too far.

Have you felt that way before?

I certainly enjoyed myself in the pool. One length after the other. There were quite a few new social distance guidelines and restrictions also in play. That said, I’ll be back again soon enough for sure.

I am a firm believer in learning, growth and development, it certainly is important to push yourself a little. However, its also important to pace yourself too. That is my lesson this morning. The aches and pains are none too pleasant. I am certainly tuning into my body today. Now I know I should have listened a little more yesterday.

Pacing means finding the right balance of activity and rest for your unique situation. In hindsight, I wished that I’d taken it just a little slower yesterday and paced myself better.

Its time today to give myself another good talking to and remind myself (again), to find the right pace for myself.  Less really is more!

How do you pace yourself when it comes to life?

 

Relevance

As I sat at a breakfast table in London 16 months ago, a question was posed about a pressing matter…”Is it relevant to their challenges of today?”
The discussions that morning were entirely devoid of the current events of that day unfolding in China thousands of miles away.
Relevance – “the degree to which something is related or useful to what is happening or being talked about.”
The issue of relevance is an important matter for all of us to consider.
Relevance comes in lots of different ways. Conveying the right message or experience is critical. It is about giving attention to, being connected with and becoming acutely aware of people and current goings on all around you.
I have found that all around us, things are always changing.  In order to maintain your relevance you will have to change some aspects of of what you do, or how you do it.
If you want to be relevant, then you must be open to change.
In the last 12 months, I have learned that anyone who resists change will be swept out of the way faster than someone who is willing to try something new. Resist the longing to cling to the old ways of doing things.
To be relevant, be open, be agile and be flexible and ready to adapt what you want to say.

Profanity

Walking through the town centre on my way home yesterday, I certainly had a rude awakening to one part of society I haven’t missed at all, profanity.

It was just awful and I found it so very, very sad.

Over the course of less than 100 metres or so, my ears were filled with several expletives from young and old as they caught up face to face for the first time in a while.  I actually found it depressing, and felt assaulted by it. As a Christian, I cannot understand why any human being chooses to use the name of deity with such disrespect.

Is it ever okay to swear?

Worryingly – blasphemy, cursing, the use of obscenities and vulgar talk is everywhere, the use of foul and abusive language has reached epidemic proportions.

Recently I stumbled across a quote that summed it up for me perfectly – “Profanity is the effort of a feeble mind trying to express itself forcefully.” Spencer W. Kimball.

We expose ourselves with our speech.

You will recall that Shakespeare urged in King Lear, “Mend your speech a little, lest it may mar your fortunes.” (act 1, sc.1,line 96.) Some may disagree and argue its only words.

My invitation – lets use self mastery and self control in our language to build, to edify, to uplift, to enlighten, to appreciate and to motivate.

Love one another

As we looked across the street I saw our neighbour’s door wide open, “that’s strange” I said to Monic. Even stranger, keys were still in the lock and her car was gone.
Worriedly, we crossed the road, rang her bell, but alas no answer. We alerted her next door neighbour and after some discussion we all decided to go in and look around. We checked everywhere and thankfully, all was in order.
Next, we locked up her home, keeping the set of keys. A call was made to her mobile phone, but there was no answer, so a voicemail message was left. Another few hours passed. Later that day we found out that our neighbour had been completely distracted by a pressing matter and had simply left for work and forgot to close and lock her front door.
Thankfully, all was well.
When asked by a Lawyer which of the commandments was the greatest, our Saviour Jesus Christ answered by summarising all of the commandments as follows… “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.” – Matthew 22: 37-39
I’d like to share three short experiences from this week, all of which happened whilst walking home. Each reminded me about how important it is to “love thy neighbour”.

#1

A few neighbours a little distance from our home were having a terrible argument on the street. It was just awful. There were raised voices, several expletives used by each other, name calling and accusations made. It wasn’t a pleasant thing to witness, before it all calmed down.

#2

Monic and I witnessed an old lady stumble and then fall across the road. Along with 1 or 2 others we quickly ran to assist, providing some tender care until she had caught her breath and could stand once more.

#3

Our own dear neighbour, who is approaching her 90th birthday, who we have grown to love and respect so much over the last 15 years, is becoming quite frail and poorly. She is the most wonderful christian lady and has been an incredible neighbour. Lately it has been quite difficult for her. Her family have rallied around and we too visit frequently to help as best we can. Arriving home the other day, I discovered that she had fallen on the garden path, whilst carrying her washing basket. In a tender moment, I reached down, cradled her in my arms and after a little while helped her back to her feet, clasping her fragile hands in my own.
How difficult is it to follow the Saviour’s admonition to simply 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫? Opportunities to serve and minister are all around us, if we will but open our eyes and see.
Through our own conduct, with warm hearts, tender acts of gentleness and kindness, lets take time to uplift all of those who whose hands may be hanging down and wearying. We too can follow the example of Jesus Christ and honour the two great commandments, by simply loving one another.

A new chapter

As one chapter in life draws to a close, another is set to begin…

One morning earlier this week, I was about to head outside to post a birthday card, when our youngest daughter Cristi was also just departing for school.  I asked if I could join her on her walk to school and she agreed that I could.

All at once, memories flooded back of the many times over the last 20 years of walking to school with our children. Walking through the rain, wind, snow and sunshine have all been experiences we’ve shared together.  The days of holding each of their hands have long since gone.  Tiny steps, eventually grew into strides together.

Walking with Cristi, I recognised quickly that this was likely to be the very last time I walked with her on part of her journey to school.  Her school days are swiftly drawing to a close, with only a few days left to go.  We talked, we laughed and to be honest, I did get a little emotional. Just for a moment there was a little tear in my eye.  I realised that the school days of our children chapter of our life together, was now rapidly drawing to an end.  As we reached Dot, the lollipop lady, we wished each other well.

Our Book of Life

Like a book, life has a beginning, and end, and a lot of chapters in between that push us forward from one event to another.  Each of us will begin many new chapters in our own book of life.  Some chapters are challenging and difficult, others are fun and exciting.  Momentarily, a little bit of sentimentality also played into my own book, with this little walk for sure.  Another sweet memory was added into my own book of life.

Ultimately change happens for each of us.

Accepting change can be hard and exciting too, as we turn the page of a new chapter in life.  For us, there are a whole new set of adventures ahead, Belgium/Netherlands beckons!!

What changes and new chapters are you set to write about in your very own book of life?

Frustration

What frustrates you?

Frustration: “…the feeling of being upset or annoyed as a result of being unable to change or achieve something.”

I know that an upside of frustration is that it tells you that you still have some important lessons to learn in a specific area.

Are you like me? Gripping a few prickly problem perhaps? You try extremely hard to resolve the issue yourself. Then anxiety and stress start to build. We become our own worst enemy, when infuriatingly despite our best efforts, we can’t resolve the matter. Grrrr!

I was like that for a little while on Saturday morning. What was this huge grizzly challenge? Of all things – a wooden gate! My woodworking skills aren’t amongst my top abilities and my stubbornness meant I wasn’t for listening to any suggestions either.

Yet, sometimes a rescuer comes along and helps. With patience, kindness and tender words, they help you to see things differently, offering alternative solutions to the issue at hand. The answer can only be received if you humble yourself, set aside your pride and listen!

As the tension subsided, working together we resolved the matter. Gate fixed! Thank you to my darling wife, for her forbearance, restraint and composure to deal with grumpy old me. Lesson learned, again!

Naps!

“Yep – I am getting old” I thought. Let me explain further…
After a very busy week of virtual design, virtual delivery, coaching and mentoring – all things that I love, Friday afternoon arrived far too quickly.  I have always been an early riser and by 12 noon yesterday, I was already feeling a little tired.  At that exact time however, my next virtual delivery session with participants from as far afield as Costa Rica to China was due to begin. I threw myself into the 90 minute session with my usual gusto and before I knew it, the time was gone.
I enjoyed a lovely lunch sitting in the sun filled front porch at home.
And then it happened….
…….In my nice comfy chair, I simply dozed off! I was completely out, counting sheep for over half an hour…!
When I awoke, I was pleasantly surprised by the passing of time. And yet, I felt both a sense of relaxation and refreshment at the same time.
My next series of virtual calls were looming and yet it felt as if my vitality and energy levels had been completely restored. It was a gentle and yet satisfying feeling of reassurance that pervaded my entire being.
The upside of a napping for me – less stress, more efficiency, better health and enhanced learning! Enjoy your next one!
How often do you take a wee nap?

The Speed of Change

Events happen that create change.

Being change agile has been critical for all of us this last year, life has changed significantly.

World War II

Cast your mind back a few generations.  At the outbreak of WWII,  the massive change of war impacted every household across the nation.  There were repercussions for everyone.

One consequence was that the UK government embarked upon a scrap drive with households all over the nation donating their iron railings and gates to the war effort. It was quite an initiative, creating a feeling of  altruistic sacrifice amongst the people of the country.  Indeed it was a feel good factor, boosting morale, we were all in this together!

The recycled iron collected was used to create steel for all kinds of uses during the war, ships, tanks, planes, tools etc.

Subsequently mile after mile of iron railings vanished from our streets.  Even after all these years, our neighbourhood still has lots of evidence to suggest that great sacrifice was made for the war effort.

Whilst out walking yesterday, we noticed that one of the larger houses in our area had new iron railings installed.  They looked great!  As we continued our walk, we observed just how many other homes in our community had never replaced the railings.  Despite the fact that 80+ years have passed by!

Somehow yesterday, the fact that one home had new iron railings, accentuated the issue, namely there were so many homes that hadn’t done anything in all those years.

So – why is that?

  • Our initial thought was perhaps people didn’t have the money to replace the railings?  Would that be the case even after 80+ years?
  • Perhaps people just aren’t interested in beautifying their homes and replacing the iron railings, its unimportant?
  • Could it be that people are just lazy and can’t be bothered?
  • Perhaps they like the little iron stubs protruding out of their walls?  – No that’s just daft we thought!
  • It could be that despite 80+ years passing, it is something that generations of homeowners have never gotten around too?
  • Maybe folks like the constant reminder that the iron stubs are an important part of the social history of the area?
  • Or after all of those ideas, could it be something completely different – that as yet we haven’t thought of?

What do we learn about the speed of change?

The speed of change at the start of WWII was incredibly fast.  The demand for steel accelerated quickly to meet the needs of the war effort.  There was a huge need, driving the change.

Post war it seems, the issue of replacement railings has only ever been addressed by a few.

There is nothing now driving the need for change.

It is simply a matter of personal motivation and a few of the factors outlined above.  The speed factor, the big event driving the change – has disappeared!  Aside from an occasional comment or passing remark, no one is driving the change.  Perhaps that it the biggest lesson of all.

What drives change in your own life and in your own community?

Curiosity

“Tell me, on a scale from 1 to 10, where are you right now?” I asked curiously…

Since my earliest childhood memories, I’ve been curious about things, people, nature, places, history, travel and culture to name a few. I have always been eager to know or learn something new and understand “why?” That probably explains one of the seemingly insatiable penchant’s of mine…..reading books!

One vivid memory from my childhood involved filling a jam jar with some foliage and then capturing a bumble bee. I’d already had some help to put some holes in the lid of the jar, so that any bee’s I captured could breath. I recall observing and listening to the bee for no more than a day, studying it, feeling sad about keeping it in a jar and then setting it free again.

Curiosity is often seen as the driving force behind not only human development, but developments in science, language, and industry. I know too that it is a vital component in coaching and mentoring

My experience is that questions driven by the curiosity of a coach can be the catalyst and driving force for change. I have come to understand that curiosity is the key to learning. It can help to expand our empathy too by helping us understand life experiences different than our own.

What are you curious about?

My world has turned upside down

In the last 12 months my work has literally turned upside down. Let me explain.
I’ve just submitted my year end financial records to my accountant (👋🏻 Lauren – Hello Accountancy- she is great by the way) for the creation of my annual 20-21 management accounts. But I noticed some startling facts I’d like to share.
As an executive coach, facilitator and leadership trainer, my business model is simple. I have several associate relationships and direct clients of my own – thanks everyone! I travel around the UK, Europe and occasionally further afield, meeting lots of people and amass rewards points staying in hotels! Oh, and I love what I do!
Then the pandemic hit.
On 23rd March 2020, with the exception of 1 virtual delivery, my entire face to face workload disappeared overnight.
Now what I thought?
Quickly, with speed and agility, I changed my business model. I upskilled on a wide range of virtual platforms and work mostly from home.
Here are the startling facts on revenues which have remained similar….
  • 2019-2020 – 95% of my revenue is face to face, with 5% virtual.
  • 2020-2021 – 95% of my revenue is virtual, with 5% face to face.
My 100,000+ annual hotel points are now zero and my travel is mostly gone.  I haven’t been on a plane for over a year.
There have been a few other challenges along the way, but I recognise that I am very fortunate too.
How have you had to adapt? How has your world changed?