Seasons

“There’s that clatter again…” I thought.
This week, whilst in Apeldoorn, interviewing our missionaries we observed a few facts.
Here in the Netherlands, things had started to fall.
Firstly, temperatures started to fall, thankfully I’d brought my jacket.
Secondly, the nights started to draw in, the amount of daylight is decreasing.
Thirdly, as the wind blew, literally thousands of acorns were falling from the oak trees around the chapel and clattering against the roof.
I won’t forget the crunching noise of all those acorns underfoot as we walked back to the car.
Days that were long and sizzling have become short and chilly.
The season has changed.
Autumn has arrived.
In nature, seasons come and go, yet nothing remains the same for very long.
Just as in nature, we experience different seasons in our life.
‘To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven. A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted.’ Ecclesiastes 1:2-3.
Truly, the seasons represent our time on earth.

𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐮𝐦𝐧 by Rainer Maria Rilke

The leaves are falling, falling as from far,
As if far gardens in the skies were dying;
They fall, and ever seem to be denying.
And in the night the earth, a heavy ball,
Into a starless solitude must fall.
We all are falling. My own hand no less
Than all things else; behold, it is in all.
Yet there is One who, utter gentleness,
Holds all this falling in His hands to bless.
Your current season of life may be difficult, but if you pause long enough, you may find it’s also a special one with unique blessings and challenges too.
Thomas S. Monson commented on making the most of each season in our lives to “provide time for family, time for work, time for study, time for service, time for recreation, time for self — but above all, time for Christ”
I’ve learned in life, that no matter how far we may fall, Jesus Christ will always lift you up again.
What are you learning in this season of your life?

Emotions!

Do you pay attention to your feelings?

Yesterday, as we drove to Apeldoorn in the early morning for interviews, the traffic was worse than normal. Here in the Netherlands, it’s called “spitsuren” (rush hours). It was becoming clear that we were going to be late.

Sometimes we can all get caught up in a cycle of our own emotions and negativity.

Have you been there?

Remember, you have a choice. You have the ability to choose your response to any situation.

We can choose to vent our emotions and “fly off the handle” which may increase our stress levels.

Or we simply put a lid on them, which can also be ineffective and over time, even quite destructive.

So, what else can you do?

Self-management is key.

It is all about how you act, react, or whether you take no action at all.

Firstly, you need to be self-aware enough to understand yourself and what triggers your emotions to be able to manage them well. Being self-aware of our feelings is a prerequisite to regulating them.

Yesterday, Monic was my rescuer as she spoke calmly, gently and measuredly, suggesting some possibilities for next time – which all made sense to me!

“So, we’ll be late” she said…

Although she was traveling in the car with me, she’d been studying for over an hour and wasn’t directly invested in the problem at hand.  That really helped, by simply getting another perspective.

Secondly, learning to pause is a great way to control our emotions.

In its simplest form it may be simply counting to 10 in your head or stepping away from the situation somehow for 5 minutes before you decide how to act.

Thirdly, shift your mood.

Move your body around, put some upbeat music on, take a walk, give someone a hug, or talk to someone.  All of these can help.

Fourthly, ask yourself – what’s important now?

Be accepting that things go wrong! That’s life.  Rather than dwelling on what you can’t control focus on what you can control in the future, rather than dwelling on problems that have already passed.

Finally, one of my favourites is to consider “how will this look in 6 months’ time?”

That’s a simple way to put things into perspective on any situation. Will you even remember? How much energy do you want to expend on something that you won’t even be thinking about in a few days’ time!

How do you control your emotional triggers?

J-O-Y.

Do you feel 𝐣𝐨𝐲 in your life?
Are you searching for it?
“The joy we feel has little to do with the circumstances of our lives and everything to do with the focus of our lives.” – Russell M Nelson.
What are you focused on?
If you are not present in your life today, you will miss the joy as it happens.
I love this picture of Annalisa Reed, Sophia Reynolds, Hailey Hunt and Melanie Coates. It’s a cold January afternoon earlier this year, yet they’re on the beach, literally jumping for 𝐣𝐨𝐲.
In that moment they were alive, alert, present, vibrant, vigorous, and enjoying the reality of life together.
Nine months later, each of them has completed their missionary service and have returned home.
Yet 𝐣𝐨𝐲 connects them to each other.
It will for a lifetime and beyond, I know that for sure.
Joy is an attitude that defies circumstances.
It penetrates deeply into our hearts and is long-lasting.
It helps each of us make peace with who we are.
I recently heard this quote about joy.
“Happiness is an inch deep and a mile wide. Joy is a mile deep and a mile wide.”
What is the connection that these young missionaries and members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints have in common, that helps them to find real joy?

It’s found in those three simple letters 𝐉-𝐎-𝐘. Joy.

𝐉 = Jesus Christ
“When the focus of our lives is on Jesus Christ and His gospel, we can feel joy regardless of what is happening—or not happening—in our lives” – Russell M Nelson.
Choose to Look Upward.
𝐎 = Others
When we love God and Jesus Christ with all of our hearts, we naturally want to share our love by losing ourselves in the service of others. It is there that we will find joy and purpose in our own lives. Our service is motivated by the pure love of Christ.
Choose to Look Outward.
𝐘 = Yourself
Along time ago I learned that I am a child of God. “If we really understood that we are literal sons and daughters of Heavenly Father, I don’t think we would ever question our value.” – Bonnie Oscarson
Choose to look Inward.
Lasting joy is found in focusing on our Saviour, Jesus Christ, and living the gospel as demonstrated and taught by Him.
The path to joy starts with faith in God and Jesus Christ.
You too can learn how following Jesus Christ’s example can help you to find lasting joy, by requesting a visit with our missionaries.
Message me to learn more.

Too much to do?

Are you pushing yourself too hard?
Personally, I’m the kind of person that likes being busy, at least most of the time.
If you are not careful enough though, the side effects of the daily routines can include – physical aches and pains, difficulty sleeping, missing meals, abandoning exercise, headaches, stomach problems, forgetting things, feeling overwhelmed, feeling guilty, isolating yourself, irritability, anxiety and even depression can all kick in.
Have you noticed any new aches and pains recently?
Maybe you should listen to your body more often?
Yes, we all need to kick into a higher gear occasionally to get things done, but we need to put things into perspective, by taking care of ourselves and our relationships.
The way to succeed is not to work long hours, but to work hard in each hour.
And take short breaks – regularly!
Remember – life is short!
It is important to take time every day for yourself and to slow down, to enjoy the beauty you can find all around.
Open your eyes and see.
Perhaps it is time for you to re-connect with your core purpose and watch how your behaviours will shift along the way.
What can you do to slow down today?

Expect the Unexpected!

Things don’t always turn out the way you planned!
On Tuesday, we waited at the arrivals gate at Schiphol Airport for our 5 new missionaries, arriving on three different flights from the USA.
“Are you sure its gate 3?”
A careful check (again) of the arrival gates clearly showed that 2 new missionaries arriving on different flights, would arrive at Gate 3 and the other 3 missionaries (on the same flight) would arrive at Gate 4.
Time passed….
No missionaries.

Hmm?

Then a message from Eldon McClure.
“Hey, President Watson? I’m at Schiphol, just got through customs. Who is going to pick me up, and where do I meet them?”
We concluded he’d arrived at gate 4, not gate 3, passed us by and arrived at the information point.
Off I went to pick him up. One down, four to go.
Back to gate 3.
Still no further missionaries.
Our Assistants go to gate 4 “just in case” for the next arrival due at Gate 3.
A few moments later they walk back to gate 3, with our new arrival Alexandra Williams.
Two down, three to go.
A check again of the arrivals board.
Yes, they are all due in at Gate 4.
So, in turn, all of us head to Gate 4.
Time passed.
“Are you sure its gate 4?”
“…Yes, take a look yourself…!”
“We’ll go to gate 3, just in case…,” said the Assistants.
More time passed.
Then a call from the Assistants, our final three Janessa Anderson, Jaislyn Kimball and Emerson Randle arrive at gate 3!
Our reactions… to the confusion?
We all laughed, hugged and chatted away.
Welcome to the Netherlands! 😆
Over the last 15 months, my new philosophy on things in general (and especially at Schiphol) is this,
…to be constantly aware of the reality that most things aren’t going to turn out how you expect!
𝐄𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐮𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝!
What do you do when things don’t go as you expect?

Discouraged?

𝐖𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲 – 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭?
Yet, sometimes life happens and it can be discouraging.
At times things we hope for and dream about just don’t turn out that way.
– the pay rise didn’t happen
– you didn’t get the expected exam grade
– the relationship you worked hard at didn’t work out
– you didn’t get the job
– the house purchase fell through
– redundancy became a reality
– ill health sets you back
– you just can’t understand that new language
– its just been a really tough day
When things don’t turn out the way you expected, then discouragement can settle into our minds and can make us feel sad.
None of us are immune from discouragement and especially in these difficult times, reality frequently does not conform to our wishes.
Discouragement does not have to mean defeat!
See it as it really is and don’t blow things up out of proportion.
Overcoming discouragement is absolutely critical for all of us if we are to bounce back and move forward in life.

So, what can you do?

First and foremost – you can change your attitude. Rather than focusing on what you can’t do, focus on what you can do.
Secondly, find something that you are good at right away, get on with it and dispel any negative self-talk, feelings or emotions that may be impacting upon you.
Thirdly – don’t compare yourself with others, remember you are on your own unique path in life.
Fourthly – turn to a friend.
Fifthly – count your many blessings, name them one by one.
Finally – pray about it, to understand and find the lesson.
“Then shalt thou call, and the Lord shall answer; thou shalt cry, and he shall say, Here I am” (Isaiah 58:9).
To receive comfort and guidance from our Father, we simply need to reach out to Him. I know He is always listening.
It is through the experience of disappointment and discouragement that great treasures and pearls of wisdom in life frequently appear.
What do you do when you feel discouraged?

N.O. Two simple letters – No

Do you ever say “𝐘𝐞𝐬” to someone, when you mean to say “𝐍𝐨?”
Its not a bad word.
Sometimes, we commit to do something because we don’t want to appear rude, or we may be afraid to upset someone.
Do you know that feeling?
However, by always saying yes, we can make ourselves ill too.
Saying yes all too often, can and will have a direct impact upon our own wellbeing.
I know that self-care is really important, especially when you are tired!
It really is okay to set personal boundaries and say “no” especially when you may already be juggling lots of different things and multiple projects at the same time.
That said, it can be tough to say no!
N.O.
Two simple letters – No.
One simple word and yet so many of us have a real problem with it.
It’s okay to say no!
If you are just learning to say no, then please be gentle with yourself and be kind too – it can take time.
It is also important to recognise when you have said yes to something, when you should have said, no instead!
On those occasions, I suggest that you make a mental note, and then let it go.
Learning to say no takes practice!
In fact, it’s absolutely essential if you want to simplify your life.
Setting some personal boundaries can help.
Boundaries can be defined as the limits we set with other people.
Our boundaries indicate what we find acceptable and unacceptable in others behaviour towards us.
Boundaries reflect what we value most deeply.
They are a form of empowerment, strength, and a way for us to align with our identity, our desires, where we stand and what we stand for in the world.
Having strong boundaries means knowing what you like, what you accept and equally, what you can tolerate.
Are yours discernible?
We need to recognise them and protect ourselves against hazards that will come in life.
One of those boundaries may be to recognise that it is okay to simply say no.
When you say ‘no’ to others you are making an important statement on boundaries, limits, and respect for your own time.
You also teach them about who you are as a person, and what’s important to you.
Finally, my top tips –
Saying no doesn’t require a thesis length explanation!
For example, some ways to say no, could include the following…
“I’d love to, but I can’t”
“That doesn’t work for me”
“I’m not comfortable with that, so no.”
Is today the day, you finally empower yourself and say no?
What helps you to say no?

Do you care?

Do you question your motives?
The crux of my personal philosophy in life, the nucleus of my personal motivation, is centred upon a core belief that “nobody cares how much you know, until they know how much you care” a phrase attributed to Theodore Roosevelt and crafted so purposely by him.
In thousands of coaching conversations, I have learned a little.
As you….
𝐋𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝
𝐀𝐬𝐤 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬
𝐀𝐫𝐞 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐮𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬
𝐄𝐱𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐩𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞
𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬, 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐝𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞.
Showing interest in others is about being yourself,
being genuine
and sincere in your interest in another person.
𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐃𝐨 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐌𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐞?

Who is your wise guide?

𝐖𝐡𝐨 𝐢𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐠𝐮𝐢𝐝𝐞?
Harry Potter had Dumbledore and Hagrid…
Luke Skywalker had Obi-Wan Kenobi and Yoda…
Froda Baggins had Gandalf…
Mowgli had Bagheera…
With the development of each fictional character, a wise guide arrives in each of their life’s.
As they place their faith in their wise guide, ultimately, he supports them toward their destiny.
Unlike many fictional movie characters however, real life is another matter altogether.

The Wisest Guide of All

Personally, my faith is not founded upon imaginary characters and their guides, but upon the wisest guide of all, even Jesus Christ.
Wise guides are not only wise, but they are also guides.
Guides direct, instruct, lead, shepherd and show us the way.
In the scriptures, the admonition to “Come, follow me” is repeated several times.
Similar phrases such as, “Walk with me,” “Follow me,” “Come unto me,” are also used regularly.
It is a very simple, direct, and powerful invitation.
The decision to follow Him, is a very personal one, that many of us choose to make.
I love these words from Hymn 116.
“Come, follow me,” the Savior said.
Then let us in his footsteps tread,
For thus alone can we be one
With God’s own loved, begotten Son.
I am so grateful for the two missionaries who introduced the restored Gospel to my parents in 1961, and for the inspired choice they made to follow the wisest guide of all and in his footsteps tread.
In the chorus of “I Am a Child of God” (Hymn 301) we find the words “Lead me, guide me, walk beside me, help me find the way.”
It is through our daily prayers, that I know He will guide us, lead us, and walk beside us.
Are you searching for a wise guide in your life?
If so, may I respectively suggest that you consider listening to a powerful message that our missionaries have to share about the wisest guide of all.
How can a 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐠𝐮𝐢𝐝𝐞 help you find your way?

Let’s huddle!

𝐈𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐮𝐝𝐝𝐥𝐞 𝐲𝐞𝐭?
Before every basketball game at High School, I recall our team would huddle together on the court, share some motivational words together, plan some tactics, culminating in a united shout of “let’s go!”
Years later, whilst studying at University, I worked part time at the local Asda superstore, and as soon as you started the morning shift, it was time to stand together for 15 minutes for our daily huddle.
Now, in the mission field, they are still part of my routine with a virtual weekly online huddle.
Huddles are all about gathering people together, sharing key information and aligning everyone for the game, the day, or the week ahead by considering what we want to achieve.
The goal of any huddle is always short term.
Any information shared is about making everyone more successful and productive, by focussing on any accomplishments, identifying top priorities, and sharing updates.
There is usually some feedback provided too.
And it is always important to leave time for questions and to ask for input from all participants.
Huddles are quick, they improve communication, people feel more connected and very quickly everyone understands what is expected of them.
It keeps everyone in the loop, while understanding what everyone else is doing too.
My experience of successful huddles suggests that they need to be short, regular, upbeat, engaging and remember to have a bit of fun too!
Have you huddled recently?