Tag Archive for: wellbeing

Lines that define

Recently whilst working with a business client, we explored the concept of personal boundaries or the red lines we draw for ourselves and are unwilling to cross, even in the most difficult of situations.
The values that define our boundaries protect our well-being and even guide our decisions.
Boundaries can often reflect our deepest principles and non-negotiables.
They shape how we interact with others and help us navigate the challenges we face.
To bring this to life, we engaged in a few activities about boundaries.
We’d already created a psychologically safe space for everyone to share in our learning session.
Participants were asked to visualise a scenario where their boundaries had been tested, a moment when they felt uneasy, conflicted, or even compromised.
They were then invited to reflect: where did they draw the line?
Many chose to share their experiences openly with the group.
Did they stand firm, or did they allow others to cross that line?
The conversations that followed were eye-opening.
People shared how recognising and honouring their boundaries had empowered them, strengthened relationships, and brought clarity in difficult situations.
Others admitted how, at times, they had failed to assert their limits, leading to regret or frustration.
Understanding your own boundaries requires courage, self-awareness, and sometimes, a willingness to say “no.”
So, where do you draw the line?
How do your boundaries reflect who you are and what you stand for?
And, most importantly, how do you ensure those boundaries are respected?

A snapshot of joy

Laughter is one of the most powerful and life-affirming experiences we can have.
And so it was as Ali, and I, visited my mum on Friday evening.
As we sat together, reminiscing about old times, sharing stories, something spontaneous happened that turned a quiet moment into one of pure joy: we started laughing.
At the end of our visit, we simply decided to take a picture together.
For some reason, the very suggestion sent us all into fits of laughter.
It wasn’t the idea of the picture itself, but rather the delightful simplicity of the moment that made us chuckle, giggle and laugh until our sides hurt.
Earlier in our visit we’d talked about some health concerns, yet as the laughter began, it was in many ways a form of release—a way to break free from the weight of life’s burdens, even just for those special few moments.

Wellbeing

Our visit with my 89-year-old mum reminded me of just how essential laughter is to our well-being, offering a connection to joy even in times of challenging health.
In her lifetime, I know mum has witnessed challenges and joys, yet in our moment of laughter together, it served as a bridge between the past and present, reminding us that life, at its core, is about finding joy in the little things.
For each of us, that moment wasn’t just about taking a picture, but about capturing a memory of joy with the people we love, creating an even stronger bond that no words could truly express.
Reflecting on the shared experience with my mum and brother-in-law, I realise we weren’t just laughing at the idea of taking a picture, but at the joy of being together, of being present in each other’s lives.

Joy

While also lifting our spirits and lightening our loads, it was a celebration of love, family, and togetherness, all wrapped up in 𝒂 𝒔𝒏𝒂𝒑𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒋𝒐𝒚, through the healing power of a good laugh.
Let’s not to take life too seriously and cherish those fleeting moments of joy that come from simply serving and being with the people we deeply love.
There is a time to have fun, laugh, play, learn and serve together.
Dale G. Renlund said: “To effectively serve others we must see them… through Heavenly Father’s eyes.
Only then can we begin to comprehend the true worth of a soul. Only then can we sense the love that Heavenly Father has for all His children.”
Looking upon my mum as a child of God, being able to laugh with her, and as we ministered to her, we felt a healing and strengthening warmth that will last forever.
Why is it important to be able to laugh at ourselves?

Someone to lean on

Yesterday, I spent some time with a dear friend and sat with him in the hospital for a while.
It struck me how important it is that we all have someone to 𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒏 on.
In life, we all face moments of challenge, uncertainty, and even joy that are made better by having someone to lean on.
Whether it’s a friend, family member, or partner, the presence of a trusted person provides emotional and psychological benefits that are invaluable.
At the very core of our well-being is the need for connection.
My experience is that as we share our burdens and joys together, it not only lightens our loads but strengthens the bonds between us.
When life feels overwhelming, knowing that there’s someone to lean on brings comfort and peace.
This sense of support reminds us that we are not alone in our struggles.
It’s more than just having someone to talk to; it’s about having someone who listens, cares, and stands by you.
Simply stated we all need that connection and support from one another, to help us navigate our way through tough times with greater confidence.
In fact, those were his words to me yesterday.
“Thanks for being here, you give me confidence.”
Everybody needs others.
And not just in tough times.
When we experience positive results, no matter how big or small, sharing those moments with someone else magnifies the joy.
Knowing that others are there to cheer us on when things are going well can add meaning to our accomplishments.
Being that person someone else leans on creates a sense of purpose and somehow it can strengthen our own resilience too.
In essence it feels good, just to be able to do some good – that warm fuzzy.
It’s a reciprocal relationship that makes everyone involved feel valued.
In our world today it can sometimes feel isolating and lonely.
Having someone to lean on, is now crucial for our mental and emotional well-being.
In the end, life becomes richer and more meaningful when we have that essential support from one another.
Step forward today and be someone to lean on…

The Good Old Days

We are made up of our memories.
And last night a few came flooding back, as Phil Gibbins and I took a stroll down memory lane….
Stepping back in time, we met at our old Oliver Wyman office at 55 Baker Street in London, followed by a meandering walk in the area and then to a favourite restaurant on Marylebone High Street.
We exchanged a warm hug; joyful smiles were ever present, and our conversation flowed easily as we engaged with one another to reminisce about “𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒈𝒐𝒐𝒅 𝒐𝒍𝒅 𝒅𝒂𝒚𝒔”.

Storytelling

As we shared our fun memories, there were stories galore and the air was filled with frequent laughter as we spoke about our crazy antics.
Together we’d weathered some notable experiences during our time frame of shared history, working side by side from 2008 – 2012.
Nostalgic moments, as we felt the power of the past that shaped our present.
Days never to be forgotten!
Over the years, although we’d connected once or twice in bite size chunks on LinkedIn and Zoom, those feelings were simply not the same as seeing each other after such a long time, in real life, to share a drink and meal together.
It was a heart warming reunion, a shared rekindling of a connection that time will never erode.

Life Happens

Life has happened and we are no longer who we once were, the signs of the passage of time had taken their toll!
Our night wasn’t just about the past, as we got caught up on each other’s current lives our aspirations and how much we had changed.
It was an occasion to reflect and appreciate just how far we had come.
A little older and perhaps a little wiser, but still as cantankerous as ever!
“It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them.”- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Maintaining ties with the past is so important.
Meeting up with Phil last night reminded me of the old Joseph Parry quote, “Make new friends but keep the old. One is silver, and the other is gold.” – it’s just so true.
As the night came to a close, we recalled our taxi driver “Malcolm” who’d regularly pick us up at Manchester Airport, and the priceless discovery that after all those years he was still on the speed dial of my phone!
Departing, we promised each other that we wouldn’t leave it so many years until we met again, perhaps next time too, with a few other former colleagues alongside for good measure!
What is the most interesting or funniest memory you’ve taken away from a reunion?

Naps!

“Yep – I am getting old” I thought. Let me explain further…
After a very busy week of virtual design, virtual delivery, coaching and mentoring – all things that I love, Friday afternoon arrived far too quickly.  I have always been an early riser and by 12 noon yesterday, I was already feeling a little tired.  At that exact time however, my next virtual delivery session with participants from as far afield as Costa Rica to China was due to begin. I threw myself into the 90 minute session with my usual gusto and before I knew it, the time was gone.
I enjoyed a lovely lunch sitting in the sun filled front porch at home.
And then it happened….
…….In my nice comfy chair, I simply dozed off! I was completely out, counting sheep for over half an hour…!
When I awoke, I was pleasantly surprised by the passing of time. And yet, I felt both a sense of relaxation and refreshment at the same time.
My next series of virtual calls were looming and yet it felt as if my vitality and energy levels had been completely restored. It was a gentle and yet satisfying feeling of reassurance that pervaded my entire being.
The upside of a napping for me – less stress, more efficiency, better health and enhanced learning! Enjoy your next one!
How often do you take a wee nap?

Are you going nowhere?

Are you going nowhere?

1 year ago, on February 1st 2020, I took delivery of my new car and was excited about the journeys ahead. Yesterday, it was back in the garage for it’s first annual service. In my 20’s and 30’s I’d be regularly driving 40,000 miles plus per year. In my 40’s & 50’s that reduced to circa 15,000 miles per year. This year, I’ve barely driven 5,000 miles and most of those were done in the first 8 weeks of ownership, pre-Covid19. Occasionally, I’ll go for a short spin, but never very far. The car passed it’s annual 40 point health check with flying colours, with tyres too that are hardly worn.

Most of the year, the car has been parked up outside, going nowhere.

Yet, just under the bonnet of the car, there is a powerful finely tuned engine, in prime condition ready to roar into action.

Similarly, there may have been days over these last few months when you’ve felt like you’re going nowhere. If you were to take your 40 point annual service health check, would you pass with flying colours, or are you feeling a little worn out?

If we want to roar into action, then we need to look after ourselves.
– Go out for a little walk (spin)
– Connect with others, listen and support
– Give of yourself
– Set a goal
– Eat well
Then you will be going somewhere!

Serving

What can I give today?

That thought alone – has helped me to endure the challenges of recent weeks. How often have you intended to help, but something else has come along and you’ve left others to help instead?

Right now we are surrounded by so many in need of our attention, our help, our encouragement, our support, our comfort, our sympathy, our understanding and our kindness. Kindness is what charity is and being kind is what we do when we have charity and compassion. The charity that we render unto others will surely define each of us and the organisations that we work for. Indeed l know that charity never faileth.

In times past when the busyness of the world blinkered our view of reality, perhaps we didn’t see? But now that we have been forced to stop and step back – take a look around, what do you see? In the grand schemes of things, perhaps you have been focused on things that don’t really matter at all?

What can you do to help someone in need today?

Choices

Earlier this morning, I discovered this poem circulating on social media – appropriately written for our time. Before hastily returning to your pre-lockdown life, please consider these words. I hope we will all choose a better way. Enjoy!

“And the people stayed home. And read books, and listened, and rested, and exercised, and made art, and played games, and learned new ways of being, and were still. And listened more deeply. Some meditated, some prayed, some danced. Some met their shadows. And the people began to think differently.

And the people healed. And, in the absence of people living in ignorant, dangerous, mindless, and heartless ways, the earth began to heal.

And when the danger passed, and the people joined together again, they grieved their losses, and made new choices, and dreamed new images, and created new ways to live and heal the earth fully, as they had been healed.”

𝑨𝒇𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆: The poem is attributed to various authors from 1869, 1919 and even now in 2020 variations of the name Kathleen O’Mara, Catherine M. O’Meara and Kitty O’Meara. My own research indicates it was written only a few weeks ago for our day by Kitty O’Meara.

What are you choosing to change?

Think!

Lately, I have reflected on many of the wonderful experiences I’ve had in my life. My journals too have really helped me to recall some great memories.

My invitation today is a simple one.

It is a really valuable exercise every once in a while to close your eyes and think! Whilst doing so, you can reflect upon lots of questions – try this one for starters…

“What is the most wonderful moment I have lived through during the last year?”

It could be a special large event, or a very simple moment or a lovely conversation with a good friend. Big or small, it doesn’t matter. Simply slow down, close your eyes, take a moment, remember that special occasion and let the warm feelings that will come lift your spirits and fill your soul. I know that memories have great power!

Remember – change starts in your thoughts!