Scaling

โ€œOn a ๐ฌ๐œ๐š๐ฅ๐ž of 1 to 10, where do you currently rate yourself?โ€.
As a coach and mentor, frequently I use the ๐’”๐’„๐’‚๐’๐’Š๐’๐’ˆ approach to measure progress.
As the coach, it can provide me with some really valuable insight into the coachee, their thinking and where they are at a given point in time with any specific situation.
Here are some examples:
On a ๐ฌ๐œ๐š๐ฅ๐ž of 1 -10โ€ฆ
โ€ฆto what degree have you made progress towards this goal?
โ€ฆhow satisfied are you in this area?
โ€ฆhow determined are you to take this action.
There are always powerful benefits of ๐’”๐’„๐’‚๐’๐’Š๐’๐’ˆ too in turn for the coachee, by helping them to assess their position in relation to their ideal outcome i.e. their 10/10.
Many follow up questions usually follow on, as I probe further in any given situation where someone is trying to progress…
For example here is one situation to consider:
โ€ข You said that you were a 3 in regard to your confidence when providing feedback to your team member.
โ€ข Tell me what makes it a 3 for you, what is your experience?
โ€ข What does it feel like being a 3?
โ€ข What are you thinking about as a 3?
โ€ข What are the reasons for a 3?
โ€ข What feedback have you had to suggest you might be a 3?
โ€ข What are the reasons you are a 3 as opposed to a 7?
โ€ข Whatโ€™s the difference for you?
โ€ข …….And many other questions follow on too!
It is more important to focus on the differences and then on the progress that can be made.
I have found ๐’”๐’„๐’‚๐’๐’Š๐’๐’ˆ to be a particularly helpful tool and use it frequentlyโ€ฆ
Itโ€™s great to try it out!
How can you apply this tool in your coaching conversations?

What is of greatest worth?

๐–๐ก๐š๐ญ ๐ข๐ฌ ๐จ๐Ÿ ๐ ๐ซ๐ž๐š๐ญ๐ž๐ฌ๐ญ ๐ฐ๐จ๐ซ๐ญ๐ก ๐ญ๐จ ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ?
Itโ€™s a question that often crosses my mind.
For a large portion of my adult life, I have been an ordained minister of religion.
As such, I have met with many people who in their older years were preparing to depart this life and pass through โ€œthe gateway we call deathโ€ โ€“ Russell M. Nelson.
I treasure the many sweet memories that Iโ€™ve been blessed to have with family members and dear friends who have already passed beyond the veil of death.

Family and Faith

Visiting with those in the closing days of life, weโ€™d frequently reminisce about those things of greatest worth, namely, family, friends, experiences and ultimately for many, their faith in and encounters with Jesus Christ.
Cherished family experiences and special tender moments are shared in a very intimate manner.
Truths are shared lovingly and freely.
Special insights, sweet stories, incredible experiences, along with miracles and wonders are commonplace, as the individual approaches deathโ€™s door and shares what matters most.
During those tender moments, attentively listening, loving, caring, sharing, spending time and being fully present is key.
A multitude of moments have been etched into my memory, in turn enriching my experience of life.

Scriptures

In my personal study of the scriptures, I have found great comfort in both the Bible and the Book of Mormon.
Reading the final chapters of Nephi (2 Nephi 33), Jacob (Jacob 7), Mormon (Mormon 7) and Moroni (Moroni 10) โ€“ these remarkable prophet/writers provide some insights into those things that may be of greatest worth to all of us.
Each of them shared a similar experience in their livesโ€™, namely they all had a personal experience with Jesus Christ.
And so, fittingly perhaps, their closing words recorded in the final chapters of their respective books, give us a deep, meaningful look into their hearts, minds and very souls.
Moroni 10:32 โ€œYea, come unto Christ, and be perfected in him, and deny yourselves of all ungodliness; and if ye shall deny yourselves of all ungodliness, and love God with all your might, mind and strength, then is his grace sufficient for you, that by his grace ye may be perfect in Christ; and if by the grace of God ye are perfect in Christ, ye can in nowise deny the power of God.โ€
Moroniโ€™s testimony and invitation to โ€œcome unto Christโ€ is a powerful and enduring one that has impacted generations of people the world over.
Like so many others, I hope that each of us will have faith in and encounter Jesus Christ in our life.
What is of greatest worth to you?

Are you tiptoeing through the tulips?

We need ๐›๐จ๐ฅ๐๐ง๐ž๐ฌ๐ฌ!
Over the last few days, I have heard several stories about individuals that have been bold and the consequences of their actions.
Those stories have inspired me to be bolder.
Frequently Iโ€™ve thought; โ€œI need to be bolder!โ€
๐ƒ๐จ ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ ๐œ๐จ๐ง๐ฌ๐ข๐๐ž๐ซ ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ๐ซ๐ฌ๐ž๐ฅ๐Ÿ ๐ญ๐จ ๐›๐ž ๐›๐จ๐ฅ๐?
๐๐จ๐ฅ๐ โ€“ โ€œnot hesitating or fearful in the face of actual or possible danger or rebuff; courageous and daring.โ€
Other words for boldness: fearless, adventurous, brave, valiant, intrepid, valorous, dauntless!
For the Star Trek fans out there, we donโ€™t need to โ€œboldly go where no man has gone before,โ€ we simply need to “๐›๐จ๐ฅ๐๐ฅ๐ฒ ๐ ๐จ!”
Hang on a minute however, I know a little about fear, and you probably do too.
Is it simply about laughing in the face of fear?
I believe that everybody has the ability to be bold, but many of us just have to dig deep to find it.

Tiptoes

Recently, whilst reading through a book on the life of M. Russell Ballard, I loved his words of encouragement, which were not to โ€œtiptoe through the tulipsโ€ but rather to be bold in our actions and conversations.
Are you tiptoeing through the tulips?
Far too often we hold back and play safe in life.
On the other hand, being bold, while both frightening and challenging at times, is essential to living a true and fulfilling life.
Boldness is about stepping up and stepping out onto our edge in lifeโ€”pushing the limits of what we think is possible or even appropriate.
I was reminded on Friday of one of my favourite little poems by the English poet, Christopher Logue.
Come to the edge.
We might fall.
Come to the edge.
It’s too high!
COME TO THE EDGE!
And they came,
and he pushed,
And they flew.
Iโ€™ve decided – It’s time to fly! (again)
What does being bold mean to you?

Are you hungry?

โ€œThatโ€™s it then, sadly we wonโ€™t be goingโ€ฆโ€
Monic and I had been so looking forward to our trip to Rome this week for our six-monthly Mission Leaders Seminar, but sadly on Sunday evening, I came down with a terrible stomach flu. Itโ€™s not been very pleasant. ๐Ÿ™
We hummed and hawed about it for 24 hours, delaying flights and changing schedules, but eventually, we sadly came to the conclusion on Tuesday morning that we wouldnโ€™t be travelling and cancelled our travel plans.
Weโ€™ll be joining everyone else in Rome via a zoom link later today.
However, it meant that Iโ€™ve been in bed for the last couple of days, feeling sorry for myself.
Iโ€™ve lost a few kilos in such a short time โ€“ thatโ€™s an indication of how rotten a bug it was.
At the same time, my tummy has been making lots of weird and whacky noises.
Iโ€™ve hardly eaten a thing but drank lots of water instead.
For the first time in a while, I felt hungry.
On the plus side Iโ€™ve done lots of reading and reflection.
Unable to feed my physical body, I focussed on feeding my spirit and nourishing my soul.
Doctrine & Covenants 88:15 reads; โ€œAnd the spirit and the body are the soul of man.โ€
Just as there is food for the body, there is food for the spirit.
Daily, as I watch the unfolding turbulent global complexities, forced to pause, ponder, and reflect longer than normal, I concluded that there is a great hunger in the world, namely, it is starved of spiritual nourishment.
I asked myself โ€œWhat would Jesus do?โ€
A question came to mind.
Are you feeding your spirit and nourishing your soul – or are you hungry?
Job 32:8 โ€œBut there is a spirit in man and the inspiration of the Almighty giveth them understanding.โ€
For instance, we may all experience physical hunger, but perhaps you have starved yourself of spiritual food for far too long?
It is a labour that takes more than an afternoon or a day or two in bed.
Why is it sometimes difficult to focus on spiritual things?
The Saviour said, โ€œI am the bread of life: he that cometh to me shall never hunger; and he that believeth on me shall never thirstโ€ โ€“ John 6:35
Not only do our physical bodies need essential nourishment, but our spirits do too.
I know it is not only important to study secular things and educate our minds, but it is also essential to nourish ourselves spiritually.
In what ways do you experience conflict between your physical and spiritual nature?

Patterns

That’s a 3-year-old me on the left, with my younger sister – both wearing cardigans knitted by my mum.
Throughout her life, mum used knitting patterns to create woollen wonders.
As a child I recall watching my mum knitting hats, socks, gloves, scarves, shawls, cardigans, jumpers and so forth! As she settled down to watch the television, she would inevitably pull out her latest knitting project – and off she went.
On a few occasions Iโ€™ve tried my hand at knitting.

Knitting

Mum gave me some pointers on casting on, and the appropriate techniques – but then I had to learn the pattern!
Have you ever tried reading a knitting pattern?
To the uninitiated, they can look like a foreign language, cast on 140 sts, knit 1, purl 1 repeat etc!
But to those who know – they are a sure pattern, followed precisely, will lead to success, each and every time. Indeed, their beauty is in their simplicity, if you understand the direction. Each pattern doesn’t just suddenly appear, it needs to be carefully considered, written and practised.
As we stand on the shoulders of those giants who have preceded us, who have lived by these patterns before, we soon realise that we can replicate success or failure depending upon the patterns of life we choose to live by.
Just as there are many thousands of well used knitting patterns, in a like manner, there are tried and tested “patterns for life” that once understood and emulated will always lead you to higher ground.
In fact, followed with exactness these patterns will always lead to success.
So what are these patterns and how do we follow them in our lives?
And by following them, what will we become?
Regarding the fundamental nature of our characters, Gordon B. Hinckley stated that; “The course of our lives is not determined by great, awesome decisions…….our direction is set by the little day-to-day choices which chart the track on which we run.
If we apply that maxim to our lives, we could say that we are the result of many small decisions.
In effect, we are the product of our choices. We must develop the capacity to recall the past, to evaluate the present, and to look into the future in order to accomplish in our lives.

Patterns for Life

Likewise I believe that we can succeed in life by following simple patterns.
1. ๐ƒ๐จ ๐ฌ๐จ๐ฆ๐ž๐ญ๐ก๐ข๐ง๐  ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ ๐‹๐จ๐ฏ๐ž. In your work and career choices, its a simple fact that if you do something that you love – then you will never work one day in your life. If you are currently following the wrong pattern – then perhaps you need a new one?
2. ๐…๐ข๐ง๐ ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ๐ซ ๐๐ฎ๐ซ๐ฉ๐จ๐ฌ๐ž. Take it one step at a time, for some it may take a lifetime to discover. But most importantly along the way, you need to apply pattern #1 – do something you love! That will help you to find your purpose and meaning in life and your work. Are you currently using the wrong-coloured wool and need a new yarn?
3. ๐’๐ž๐ซ๐ฏ๐ž ๐Ž๐ญ๐ก๐ž๐ซ๐ฌ. Find out exactly who you can help and serve along the way. Follow the promptings of your heart and apply pattern #1 – give service through doing something you love! This will help you find even more joy in the journey. Perhaps you are using the wrong sized needles and you need some larger ones?
4. ๐“๐š๐ค๐ž ๐€๐œ๐ญ๐ข๐จ๐ง. Choose to Act, and not be acted upon.
I know that our daily actions will determine our character. Take ownership of your own personal journey. What’s holding you back, is it perhaps that you have got stuck with a complicated part of your pattern? Why not seek out a personal coach to help you along the way? In turn they can help you to interpret the pattern for your life.
For me, I have witnessed a lifetime of beautiful woollen wonders created by mum and many others who can read the patterns.
In a like manner as we form our patterns for life, our life will be formed by those patterns.
Get yourself organised!!
Why not follow a new pattern, get some new yarn, some different needles for yourself, home and career today by knitting together some life changing habits – you won’t regret it!
๐–๐ก๐š๐ญ ๐ซ๐ž๐ฉ๐ž๐š๐ญ๐ž๐ ๐ฉ๐š๐ญ๐ญ๐ž๐ซ๐ง๐ฌ ๐š๐ซ๐ž ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ ๐ค๐ง๐ข๐ญ๐ญ๐ข๐ง๐  ๐ข๐ง๐ญ๐จ ๐ญ๐ก๐ž ๐Ÿ๐š๐›๐ซ๐ข๐œ ๐จ๐Ÿ ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ๐ซ ๐ฅ๐ข๐Ÿ๐ž?

Sifting

โ€œWould you like a hot chocolate?โ€

Thatโ€™s a favourite phrase I use when missionaries arrive at the mission home for an overnight stay.

Each cup of hot chocolate is made with all the usual ingredients, but above all, it is filled with lots of love.

The most delicate part of the process is the ๐ฌ๐ข๐Ÿ๐ญ๐ข๐ง๐  of the chocolate powder, for the final touches, to make it perfect.

To ๐ฌ๐ข๐Ÿ๐ญ: โ€œput a fine or loose substance through a sieve so as to remove lumps or large particles.โ€

โ€œTo make a close examination of all the parts of something in order to find something or to separate what is useful from what is not.โ€

At zone conferences last week, I commented on how we are all being “๐’”๐’Š๐’‡๐’•๐’†๐’….”

In Luke 22:31-32, at the Last Supper, calling him by his given name, Jesus said…

31. โ€œโ€ฆSimon, Simon behold Satan hath desired to have you, that he may ๐ฌ๐ข๐Ÿ๐ญ you as wheat.โ€

To ๐ฌ๐ข๐Ÿ๐ญ as wheat means to sperate the good grain from the chaff.

In other words, โ€œYouโ€™re going to be run through the ๐’”๐’Š๐’‡๐’•๐’†๐’“ Peter. Indeed, youโ€™re going to find out whatโ€™s in you Peter.โ€

In essence, youโ€™re going to be shaken up and bounced around and go through a tough ordeal.

Like Peter, that is especially true in the mission field, where we are all ๐’”๐’Š๐’‡๐’•๐’†๐’… as wheat โ€“ daily!

The ๐ฌ๐ข๐Ÿ๐ญ๐ข๐ง๐  is done to refine us, and, in the process, we find out what we are made of, by discovering our many weaknesses.

Before that night was out, Peter had denied Christ three times.

32. โ€œBut I have prayed for thee, that thy faith fail not; and when thou are converted, strengthen thy brethren.โ€

As Christ prayed for Peter, likewise many, many others pray on our behalf every single day, โ€œthat thy faith fail not.โ€

For example – mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, grandparents, church members and leaders, missionary companions, and many others of other faiths too, pray every day for you.

Throughout life, all of us will be ๐ฌ๐ข๐Ÿ๐ญ๐ž๐ and refined.

You will be shaken, stirred and cleansed to make the perfect you.

Yet, like Peter, I know that by following Jesus Christ, you will not fail.

How are you being ๐ฌ๐ข๐Ÿ๐ญ๐ž๐?

Procrastination!

Are you putting things off – again!?
Aren’t you tired of that lame old excuse?
Have you considered and reflected upon what really matters most in your life recently?
Far too frequently do you allow distractions of the world to cloud and distort your judgement, causing you to delay making important decisions in life? Is that you perhaps?
Procrastination is a stubborn enemy for many of us.
For some it will raise its head, over and over and over again.

โ€œProcrastination is my sin.
It brings me naught but sorrow.
I know that I should stop it.
In fact, I will โ€” tomorrow!โ€

โ€”ย Attributed to Gloria Pitzer

Many, many years ago, I was given a little gift – similar to the picture above.
It was a “๐‘๐Ž๐”๐๐ƒ ๐“๐”๐ˆ๐“”
I am sure many of you will have seen one, or may have given or received one.
Today – I wish to gift a virtual one to everyone!
Now is the time. Seize the day…!
Set out to accomplish those things that need to be done.
Change your perspective – reframe.
By doing so, it will enable you to see that things that seemed so important only a moment ago, are actually of little interest.
Don’t let those unimportant things distract you from what really matters most. Your life, your happiness, your family, a career that you enjoy, an organisation that has values congruent with your own.
Step back.
Reflect.
Take action.
Apply this virtual gift today.
……What do you need to consider?

“Will we take the stairs?”

Heading down to breakfast from our 6th floor hotel room in Brussels yesterday, in unison we said; โ€œWill we take the stairs?โ€
It was followed by โ€œit may be the only exercise we get today!โ€
And so, we opened the stairwell door and walked down happily together.
โ€œTheyโ€™re not as steep as Dutch stairwells for sureโ€ฆโ€ we quipped.
Following our breakfast, the climb back up the stairs to the 6th floor was a little tougher โ€“ thatโ€™s for sure!
Discipline is often a choice.
The harder right is ๐’‚๐’๐’˜๐’‚๐’š๐’” more difficult to face than the easier wrong. (At least that’s my experience!)
Thatโ€™s why we are frequently not good at it and many of us can struggle.
It requires discipline!
The choice is always our own.
Please note that it was not wrong to take the lift, but it certainly would have been easier.
However, taking the harder path is, well…hard!
It frequently requires us to be uncomfortable and to give a little extra.
There are always consequences to routinely taking the path of least resistance as opposed to choosing the harder right.
Even if right decisions might be formidable, we need to strive to make them.
I know that if we make a choice ๐’ƒ๐’†๐’‡๐’๐’“๐’† it happens, it will be easier when the situation presents itself.
For example โ€“ we always take the stairs, no matter the floor!
โ€œMay we ever choose the harder right, instead of the easier wrongโ€ โ€“ Thomas S. Monson
How often do you choose the easy way, rather than the hard?

Armed with Righteousness

โ€œCan we get a light sabre photo?โ€ asked Elizabeth Anderson.
Following a crunching tackle whilst playing football on P-day, she ended up with a badly sprained ankle, some support bandaging, and a pair of crutches.
Elizabeth has quite an imagination, so, arming ourselves for our light sabre battle was fun.
There are, however, many battles in our lifeโ€™s that are not quite so fun.
Daily we see real life battles played out in war torn cities in Ukraine.
Other personal battles can take the form of; financial difficulties, relationship issues, career pressures, inner battles with doubts, mental health anxieties, testimony concerns, abuse, insecurities, trauma, fear, bullying, parenthood issues, and many more.
What battles are you facing now?
How do you overcome your personal battles?
โ€œThe battles that count arenโ€™t the ones for gold medals. The struggles within yourself, the invisible, inevitable battles inside all of us, thatโ€™s where itโ€™s at.โ€ Jesse Owens.
Winning those battles oftentimes takes extra effort.

Extra Effort

For me, the extra effort comes through self-reflection, slowing down daily, connecting with the divine part of myself, renewing my spiritual strength through prayer, scripture study and treasuring up the words of God.
Spiritual strength comes through faith, obedience, and repentance.
Neil L. Andersen said. โ€œAs you arm yourself for battle, your protection comes from God, who is our Father. You have faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, and you take His name upon [you].โ€
He goes on to say, โ€œWhile the battle rages, we need not fear. The Lord will help you, your family, and others you love who need special help. We know the outcome. The Saviour will triumph over all!โ€
I know personally that it is through our conversion to the restored gospel of Jesus Christ and by following Him, that brings happiness, peace, real joy, and a bright hope for the future.
In Isaiah 41:10 we read, โ€œFear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.โ€
Recently, I spoke about being โ€œarmed with righteousnessโ€ โ€“ 1 Nephi 14:14.
To survive the battles of our day, arming ourselves with light sabres would be nice if they were real, but the reality of our battles requires us to consider one of our greatest allies of all โ€“ even Jesus Christ.
He will help us to overcome all our battles and ultimately provide the greatest victory of all by defeating the sting of death, through His glorious resurrection.

Your true potential

๐€๐ซ๐ž ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ ๐๐ž๐๐ข๐œ๐š๐ญ๐ž๐ ๐ญ๐จ ๐š ๐œ๐š๐ฎ๐ฌ๐ž?
I believe that happy people are involved in something they believe is much bigger than themselves.
Indeed, I have found that those who are happiest oftentimes lose themselves in a meaningful job or worthwhile cause.
Furthermore, those who find satisfaction in many organisations often describe their daily work as a โ€œ๐’„๐’‚๐’๐’๐’Š๐’๐’ˆโ€ rather than a job or even a career.
Individuals who make this connection with a calling see their work as contributing to the greater good, to something larger than they are.
Those feelings are prevalent in our current service opportunity here in the Belgium Netherlands Mission.
It is an honour and a privilege to work with so many young missionaries from all around the world.
Like each of our missionaries, I have a strong desire to serve and help others.
In essence, simply, to do good.
It drives my behaviour and aligns my beliefs and thinking.
What about you?
Being involved in a cause can give our lives greater meaning, purpose and direction in lots of different way โ€“ it keeps us actively involved in something we feel is worthwhile, that is making a difference to a greater good.
It helps us by looking beyond ourselves and our own self interest.
โ€œFocusing your life solely on making a buck shows a certain poverty of ambition. It asks too little of yourself. Because itโ€™s only when you hitch your wagon to something larger than yourself that you realise your true potential.โ€ Barack Obama
๐–๐ก๐š๐ญ ๐œ๐š๐ฎ๐ฌ๐ž ๐ก๐š๐ฌ ๐ญ๐ก๐ž ๐ฉ๐จ๐ญ๐ž๐ง๐ญ๐ข๐š๐ฅ ๐ญ๐จ ๐ฅ๐ข๐Ÿ๐ญ ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ ๐ก๐ข๐ ๐ก๐ž๐ซ?