Bruised, But Not Broken

It all started so promisingly.
Arriving early at Murrayfield yesterday, for the friendly rugby international, Scotland v USA on a lovely evening in Edinburgh.
Amilya, Hazel and I were excited.
The build up was loud with a DJ in action pumping up the volume.
A lot of pride was in the air with our respective national anthems – the Star-Spangled Banner and Flower of Scotland.
We were all set for the action to unfold!
I did warn my two American friends that it could be rather one sided!
It was only a few minutes before Scotland scored, then again and again and again.
By half time it was 45 – 0.
By full time it was 85 – 0, sweeping aside the USA for their biggest ever Murrayfield win.
I don’t think anybody attending the match thought Scotland were ever in any danger of losing, but the scale of Scotland’s win was impressive.
And depending on your perspective, it may feel brutal, even a little unfair.
What struck me though about the Americans was they didn’t quit!
They kept tackling, kept resetting, kept showing up.
Outmatched, yes – but not undone.
Such a humbling defeat isn’t easy for anyone to accept.
Despite the loss, it was fun watching Amilya and Hazel, they had a great time in a stadium that rocked from start to finish.

Compelled to be Humble

Sometimes we are compelled to be humble – and yesterday was one of those days for the American rugby team.
It reminded me of this verse from the Book of Mormon:
“And now, because ye are compelled to be humble, blessed are ye.” – Alma 32:13
That kind of humility, the kind we don’t choose, but are forced into, can feel a little rough.
Embarrassing, possibly even unfair.
But in a gospel sense in God’s eyes, it’s still an opening, it’s still a beginning.
Because what matters isn’t how we were humbled, rather what matters is what we choose to do next.
So, the question I’m asking myself this Sunday morning is:
When life humbles me, do I let it shape me? Or just shame me?

Small Moments, Big Shifts

Its been nearly two months since I stepped into my new leadership facilitation role with Aviva.
I’ve been busy learning lots about new programmes and perhaps most meaningfully, seeing the power of thinking partnerships.
One of my favourite moments in many of our recent Lead the Way workshops comes during a simple but powerful “buddy coaching” conversation.
There are four different variations of the programme, depending upon seniority level.
During each programme, individuals are frequently randomly paired together.
It’s there, that the coaching conversations begin.
One person reflecting, the other listening deeply and asking thoughtful questions.
We encourage them to be curious.
Two people, fully present, exploring what it means to grow.
On the surface, it seems like a short exercise.
However, I’ve noticed that it only takes a few intentional minutes with a learning buddy like this, to unlock something deeper, a fresh idea or perhaps a new direction for them to consider.

Sitting and Walking

Buddy coaching isn’t simply about sitting opposite each other at a table, some of the best conversations and discoveries are made whilst out for a walk together.
Changing the environment can really help each of us change how we look at things.
“Walking is man’s best medicine.” – Hippocrates
In their conversations, leaders ask each other:
• How would you describe yourself as a leader right now?
• What assumptions do you carry about leadership?
• What would ‘better’ look like for you?
Every time we run this exercise, there is a noticeable, yet subtle shift in the energy in the room, from quiet reflection to rich dialogue.
These short listening and questioning exercises help people slow down and connect.
Interestingly, another upside is they think more intentionally about how they lead and respond to change.
Sometimes the most profound learning moments don’t come from slides or theories, but from being truly heard by another person.
A simple reminder that great leadership often starts with great listening.
When was the last time you truly listened, not to respond, but to understand?

What’s in a Name?

As participants arrived in the room, one by one, they’re given their name tags.
At the same time, they tick their names off the participant list and registration is complete.
A few minutes later during our check in, everyone introduces themselves to the group.
But there’s one challenge that never seems to get any easier for me, even after years of practice… names!
Currently, every few days, I find myself faced with a fresh set of twenty to thirty or so new names to learn.
It’s no small task.
I’m not exactly sure why, but some are easy to remember, others take a few tries, and occasionally I’ll mix up two people completely, especially when there’s a Mark, a Matt, and a Martin in the same room!
Yesterday, the tables turned.
A couple of participants started calling me by the wrong name and not just once!
I could tell they felt a bit embarrassed when they realised, so, in the spirit of fun, I decided to join in.
When one of them said, “Thanks, Darren,” I smiled and replied, “No problem, Martin.” (His name was definitely not Martin.)
Cue a big smile and some laughter.
It broke the tension instantly.
The moment became fun and light-hearted.
Later, as we reflected on the day, I realised something simple yet powerful: learning names is an act of leadership.
It’s about presence.
It’s about seeing people.
When we take the time to remember someone’s name, we’re telling them, “You matter. You’re worth remembering.”
Getting it wrong occasionally?
That’s just part of the journey.
What matters is how we recover, with grace, humour, and a wee bit of warmth.
So, to all the participants out there.
Could you help us facilitator’s out?
If you spot us in an office somewhere, to ease the triggering of the mental panic, please say hello and quickly remind us of your name – just in case!
Leadership, at its best, is all about connection, and sometimes, connection begins with something as small as a name.
What other “small” leadership habits have a big impact on connection and belonging?
p.s. – maybe some bigger name tags may help too! 😅

The Light is Building

These last few months have been filled with long hours, careful planning, and the combined effort of dozens of volunteers from around the country, all preparing for the 2025 Christmas Light the World Charity Machines campaign here in the UK.
It’s been an extraordinary team effort.
From spreadsheets and storage visits to unpacking machines and testing our brand-new digital displays, plus meetings galore, the work behind the scenes has been simply remarkable.
A recent visit to our London storage site, packed with machines, Christmas lights, scarves, and signage, made it all start to feel real.
The digital machines have arrived, unwrapped, and are now coming to life.

Launch Events

The excitement is building too for launch events this Christmas, at Parliament in Westminster, and our host venues at 𝐒𝐩𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐟𝐢𝐞𝐥𝐝𝐬 𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐞𝐭 (6th – 20th December) in London and 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐁𝐮𝐥𝐥𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 in Birmingham (1st – 21st December). ✨
Each machine is simple in purpose but profound in impact.
Instead of buying something for yourself, you can choose to purchase a goat, a meal, a winter blanket, or even school supplies for someone in need – near or far.
With 100% of every donation going directly to our charity partners who deliver these items and services to those they serve.
But to make it all work, we need your help. ❤️
We’re now seeking volunteers to help staff the machines throughout their placement in December, in Birmingham and London.
Each shift involves welcoming visitors, helping them understand how the machines work, and sharing in the joy of giving.
You’ll also help at the many events being planned around the machines, including choirs, community gatherings, and festive performances that will light up the season.
If you’d like to volunteer, please get in touch – we’d love to have you on the team.
“Therefore, let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.” – Matthew 5:16
Together, we’re lighting the world, one act of love, one small gift, and one bright smile at a time.
Who could you invite to share in the joy of giving?

Reflections from the Edge

Yesterday, I was co-facilitating a leadership session in Perth with my colleague Sophie Edmond.
Early in the session, we were talking about past leadership programmes the participants had attended.
As stories were shared, a favourite poem by Christopher Logue came to mind.
I recited it as best I could to the group and then after finding it again online, wrote it up on a flipchart…
𝑪𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒆𝒅𝒈𝒆.
We might fall.
Come to the edge.
It’s too high!
COME TO THE EDGE!
And they came,
and he pushed,
And they 𝒇𝒍𝒆𝒘.
Afterwards, I noticed a few puzzled expressions around the room.
I took some time to explain my thoughts.

From comfort to stretch zone

When asked to be a leader, it can often bring us right to the very edge of our comfort zone.
It can also challenge our capability, of what we think we can handle.
And yet, here they were, leaders from all walks of life, and different parts of the Aviva organisation, showing up with curiosity, openness, and the courage to start stretching their wings.
Yes, there was hesitation.
Yes, there was fear.
But there was also a real willingness to grow, to take risks, to learn and to move into their stretch zones.
Through my lifetime, I have learned that leadership is oftentimes about pushing past our fears.
Sometimes it’s about holding the space while others get ready.
But time and again, it’s about standing at the edge with your people… encouraging, challenging, supporting and knowing when to move forward together.
That’s what I witnessed in Perth yesterday.
Leaders on the edge.
Some nervous. Some unsure. But all leaning in.
Not just ready to learn, but ready to lead others to the edge, to fly… and beyond.
I can’t wait to be back with them all today and encourage a little more!
What are you doing and how are you helping others to find their wings?

Learning to Lead

Yesterday whilst co-facilitating the new Lead the Way leadership programme for Aviva in Perth, we got talking about our own leadership journeys for a wee while.
I shared one of my earliest stories.
In the summer of 1977, we had just moved house, and I had also just finished Primary School.
I was twelve years old.
There was lots of change going on for me and our family.
Everything felt a little unfamiliar a new place, new people, and the transition to High School ahead of me.
That summer I took on my first job, in an early morning paper round at the local newsagent.
It was easy enough, delivering newspapers in the quiet stillness before the day began.
But I didn’t just do the job; I paid attention.
I quickly learned the five different routes, how they worked, and who covered them.
Then, it wasn’t long before the newsagent began to trust me with more, including a few extra deliveries, managing new routes, then stepping in when others didn’t show.
Bit by bit, I found myself not just doing a job but being responsible for making sure it all ran smoothly.
Looking back, I see now that’s where my leadership journey quietly began.
Not with a title or a grand plan, but with trust, consistency, and a willingness to step up.
As John Maxwell said, “Leadership is not about titles, positions or flowcharts. It is about one life influencing another.”
That summer, I wasn’t thinking about leadership.
But I was learning how it starts, simply by showing up, taking responsibility, and earning trust.
That lesson has stayed with me ever since.
And as I reflect about it more this morning… maybe it began even earlier, when I was nine and made a seconder in the Cub Scouts, but that’s another story!
What about you?
What early experience taught you the value of responsibility?

Sharing Light, Building Hope

Earlier this year, I was asked to coordinate the Church’s Light the World charity machine initiative across the UK for Christmas 2025.
The Initiative features customised vending machines and kiosks stocked with tangible items and services to help people in need, either in the UK or across the world.
In turn these items and services provide a meaningful and memorable way to show love and extend hope to individuals and families.
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints covers all costs associated with the charity machines and receives zero financial benefit.
100% of every donation goes directly to the participating nonprofit organisations.
For me, it’s been a wonderful opportunity to serve and build many new friendships along the way too.

Light the World

Following a lovely meal together on Friday evening, yesterday, many of us from across the UK Communications Council gathered at the Preston Temple in Chorley, for our annual training meeting.
It is always a wonderful opportunity to learn, connect, and refocus our shared purpose for the year ahead.
It was also great to finally meet Naomi Notice, our City Lead for London, face to face.
In recent months, like so many involved in the Light the World campaign, we’ve had frequent calls and messages, as the pace of the project quickens.
Naomi’s enthusiasm and creativity have already made a massive difference.
She brings oodles of energy, professionalism, and a huge heart for service – essential qualities that perfectly capture the spirit of the whole Christmas initiative.
As we met together, the temple provided a beautiful reminder of why we do what we do: to share light, to build bridges of understanding, and to invite others to feel the love of Jesus Christ.

Giving

This initiative offers both givers and receivers the chance to experience “good tidings of great joy” (Luke 2:10).
Meeting together throughout the day, there was a real sense of shared purpose and hope for all of us as we looked ahead over the next 5 to 10 years of significant projects not only here in the UK but around the world.
It was a reminder of how much can be achieved when we work together in faith and unity.
2025 is shaping up to be a remarkable year for Light the World – Charity Machines in the UK, and yesterday’s meeting renewed our collective commitment to make it our best yet.
Look out for the machines in December this year at the Bullring in Birmingham and Spitalfields Market in London.
What small act of love or service could brighten someone’s day this week?

Creating Space to Learn

Its been a quick week.

On Monday, I arrived at our venue a couple of hours before the start of the latest leadership session, I was just observing after all, but my fellow facilitators had been there for a good wee while longer!

Arriving early as a learning facilitator, is critical.

The magic however of a great learning experience doesn’t begin when the first participant walks into the room, it starts days, weeks and even months, before.

Long before a single chair is straightened or a workbook is placed on the table, facilitators are already deep in preparation.

For this programme, the preparation began in partnership, working closely with Korn Ferry Management Consultants to shape the design, alongside Aviva’s learning consultants to refine the flow and feel of the sessions.

From there came hours of reviewing materials, crafting thoughtful questions, building stories, and attending to the small details that help people connect and learn together.

Then of course there is hours of work done by our events team, who have been organising venues, coursebooks, materials, travel, meals, and most importantly of all – delegates!

This week our facilitators travelled from far and wide, bringing not only their suitcases but their energy, insights, and passion for helping others grow.

Arriving early to set up the space, check the slides, arrange materials, and make sure every table feels ready for learning, it’s all part of facilitation life.

Because when the first delegate walks in, everything should quietly say, you matter, and we’re ready for you.

Facilitation isn’t just about delivery.

It’s about intention. Preparation. Presence.

It’s about creating the conditions where learning can truly come alive.

What does great preparation look like in your world?

A Fireside Chat to Remember

Yesterday, I had the pleasure of observing a fireside chat with a senior leader unfold in the Lead the Way programme at Aviva in Perth.

It was enjoyable to sit there and watch the learning unfold.

As I understand it, a few days earlier, there was a short call between the facilitator and the cohort sponsor, to discuss the opportunity at hand.

That early conversation helped shape the flow, clarify expectations, and set the tone for what would become a powerful learning experience.

These chats don’t happen in every session, but are organised when calendars and time align.

From the moment the chat began, there was an openness in the room and a genuine curiosity to learn.

Course participants were invited to ask questions, and they were asked with warmth, thoughtfulness, and respect.

The leader’s responses were real, honest, and at times filled with humour.

Many personal stories brought key topics to life, offering both insights and reassurance that leadership, at its heart, is a human endeavour.

One of the standout moments came when someone asked, “How would you describe your work–life balance?”

The leader paused, smiled, and replied with calm confidence: “Disciplined. I have outside interests, things that are non-negotiable. They keep me grounded.”

That simple, authentic answer said it all.

Throughout the conversation, there was laughter, reflection, and a shared sense of purpose.

It wasn’t just a Q&A, for many in the room, it was a real live mentoring session.

The whole session sparked real connection, fostered networking, and built relationships across the cohort.

For me, it was a joy to see such a positive experience unfold, that blended insight, humility, and humanity in equal measure.

What stories from your own journey could help others see the human side of leadership?

Looking Up

Last weekend, speaking at General Conference, Elder Jeffrey R. Holland gave one of the most moving talks I’ve ever heard.
With his “diminished” yet powerful voice, his brief rendition of 𝐀𝐦𝐚𝐳𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐞 was electrifying.
A quite remarkable testimony of Jesus Christ that touched my heart.
His spirit filled words, were an incredible witness of truth, “𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘐 𝘴𝘦𝘦.”
And it was a witness that will linger in my soul and millions of others for generations to come.
As we were still processing the spirit of it all, Megan sent this photo of our 10-month-old grandson, Oscar.
There he stood, steadying himself on the TV stand, literally looking up to Elder Holland.
The timing couldn’t have been more perfect.
Oscar, with childlike awe and curiosity, looking up to a man I’ve looked up to for decades.
It was far more than cute.
It was profound.
The Lord asks us to become as little children, not because they know more, but because they see more clearly.
In a world that often pulls our eyes downward, here was a reminder to all of us to keep looking up, to faith, to truth, to those who lead with love and light.
And in that small, ordinary moment in the living room, we caught a glimpse of something eternal: one generation quietly passing on reverence to the next.
Oscar doesn’t know who Elder Holland is yet, but maybe he sees more than we realise, the kind of seeing that only a child can.
Someday he will and he is clearly already tuning in.
And perhaps for Oscar, in his own innocent way, “𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘐’𝘮 𝘣𝘦𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘦𝘦” too.
“One thing I do know, that, whereas I was blind, now I see.” – John 9:25
And when he really does, I hope he knows that his family has always looked up, to apostles, to the Saviour, and to the hope that binds us all together.
Who have you looked up to that helped you see more clearly?