Tag Archive for: leadership

What’s your one word?

In a recent virtual learning session, I kicked off with a simple question as a little icebreaker…
“Give me one word to describe how you’re communicating these days.”
Pausing for a moment to consider their responses, words started to appear in the chat box, including some of the following:
Friendly. Rationally. Deeply. Detailed. Concisely. Comprehensively and many more.
Immediately, we were off to a powerful and thoughtful start.
Some participants then chose to explain further why they were communicating in that manner.
They mentioned their tone, their intentions and the impact it was having.
They began to see and understand the impact beyond their words.
New insights about presence, awareness, mindset and leadership came to the fore.
It turned out to be a moment of powerful reflection for everyone.
Each of us communicate in some way or form every day.
Speaking.
Texting.
Writing.
Posting.
And it doesn’t have to be words, more powerful is our body language and the visual clues we send.
Often, it’s the unspoken that lands the loudest, such as, silence, tone and eye contact.
When was the last time you stopped to ask how you’re actually communicating?
In our session, the simple act of naming how we communicate opened the door to group learning, personal insight, and stronger accountability.
So, pause for a second.
What’s your one word?
And more importantly: is it working for you?

26D and Me

Yesterday was a long one.
I left home at 5:00 a.m. and returned at 12:30 a.m.
A full on 19.5-hour day.
In between was a drive to and from the airport, two flights, the London underground, two train rides, a few Zoom calls squeezed in at stations and cafés, some meetings, and plenty of walking across a hot and bustling London.
Through all that travel, one small detail stood out: 𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐭 𝟐𝟔𝐃.
I didn’t book it, I didn’t choose it, but it chose me twice.
The day began with a British Airways flight from Edinburgh to London City Airport.
After an early morning delay of over an hour, due to a faulty megaphone, we boarded, and I found my place in seat 26D.
My mind was on the day ahead, with travel, meetings to navigate, decisions to make, and several planned conversations that really mattered.
The flight was short, but in that little space I rehearsed, prepared, prayed and planned.
The morning version of me was purposeful and hopeful.
The flight down was a chilly one, but London greeted me with warm air and fast footsteps.
It was hot down there!
From Docklands to Liverpool Street, I criss-crossed the city on the DLR and tube.
Through the day were some great face-to-face meetings and Zoom calls too.
It was one of those days where there was a lot going on and I just kept moving forward.
By late afternoon, I was done in.
I made my way to Stansted, weary but grateful.
Boarding the delayed EasyJet flight home, I glanced at my boarding pass, seat 26D again.
Two different airlines. Two different airports. Same seat.
That’s a 1 in 23,040 chance of being randomly assigned seat 26D on both flights!
I may have been in the same numbered space, but I wasn’t the same person.
The morning me, 26D carried a version brimming with intent.
The evening me, 26D carried a quieter, sleepier version.
Tired, yes, but thoughtful, happy and reflective.
The same seat, but a different state of mind.
26D was the same number, but I had changed.
I’m sure we all have days like that full-on, demanding, stretching.
What in your life looks the same on the outside, but feels completely different on the inside?

Two Roads to Humility…

It has been an interesting week thus far in my consulting and coaching world.
I’ve encountered one word, several times over – 𝒉𝒖𝒎𝒊𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚.
I’ve worked with different organisations on a number of leadership topics, and yet time and again, our conversations have returned to humility.
Life has taught me that there are two main pathways to humility.

By Choice

Firstly, we can 𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐬𝐞 to be humble.
There comes a time when we each have to pause and acknowledge that things aren’t going the way we’d hoped.
It takes real courage to admit, first to ourselves and then to others, that we’re stuck, unsure, or sometimes even, simply way out of our depth.
Humbling ourselves means choosing to open up rather than pretend we’ve got it all together.
It might look like asking for advice, learning from someone who’s walked a similar path, picking up a book, or reaching out to someone we trust.
It’s a quiet but powerful step: a willingness to grow, rather than go it alone.

By Compulsion

Secondly, we are 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐝 to be humble.
This one can be even tougher, much tougher.
Being humbled often arrives over time, uninvited, through failure, disappointment, or moments when the truth hits home really hard and we realise we’re the ones who got it wrong.
Sometimes even a sense of shame can haunt us for a while.
Its my witness, that it is in those uncomfortable moments that conversely something good can start to happen.
It’s the start of taking ownership, of letting go of pride, and choosing a more sure path.
Though painful, being humbled can become the turning point, where we begin to rebuild more honesty, deeper empathy, and stronger self-respect.
I’ve experienced this in my own life, several times over and it truly is painful.
Research shows, that in the leadership world, when companies hire humble leaders, the whole organisation benefits.
It’s a fact, that leaders who have learned to walk in humility, to be curious, and to engage others collaboratively, are more likely to succeed.
Just think what might happen if we choose to live by this virtue, in our own homes…
Indeed, life is a long lesson in humility!
Which path to humility are you currently walking, and what might change if you chose to take the first step, willingly?

The Cost of Being Lukewarm

Have you ever taken a sip of lukewarm water?
It’s unpleasant, not refreshing, just bland.
Sometimes our lives can feel the same way.
“Fire” or “heat” often serve as symbols of power, knowledge, enthusiasm, vigour and yet can also represent destruction and judgement.
Consider the following:
– She’s set the world on fire.
– He has got a fire in his belly.
– She is a ball of fire.
– He is burning with ambition.
Over the years I have worked with many leaders who have some “fire in their belly”.
Others I’ve met who may be in that undesirable place midway between hot and cold, or even more strikingly “lukewarm”.
I’m reminded of the scripture in Revelation 3:15 – 16 which says “I know thy works, that thou are neither cold nor hot: I would thou were cold or hot. So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold not hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth.”
In this context the scripture represents a lack of spiritual passion or commitment.
This idea of someone being lukewarm could be described as follows:
– She’s just going through the motions.
– He’s just coasting along.
– She’s half-hearted about it.
– He’s blowing hot and cold.
It has been my experience that if we want to be successful in our personal or professional lives, we need to ignite that inner fire.
Don’t settle for lukewarm!

Lukewarm: the enemy of progress

Passion, drive, and commitment fuel progress, innovation, and meaningful change.
Without them, we risk stagnation, simply drifting along without direction or impact.
When you are lukewarm about something, the results are frequently the same.
That’s not to say enthusiasm alone guarantees success, but when combined with purpose and perseverance, it becomes a powerful force.
The most effective leaders I’ve met are those who bring warmth, energy, and conviction to their work.
Their hearts can inspire other hearts with their fire.
Their secret? It’s quite simple really, they do something they love to do!
They go to work but never “work” a day in their life!
So, where do you find yourself?
Are you on fire, lukewarm, or simply going through the motions?

Bee-Inspired

Last night, I had the chance to meet up with some dear friends and fellow coaches, Philip Atkinson and Dave Kesby.
I joined with many other guests for the launch of Philip’s leadership book “Bee Wise” at the Royal Over-Seas League in London.
Philip is not only a remarkable Organisational Coach, but he is also a beekeeper and an accomplished one at that.
In his book he “lifts the lid on what happens inside a hard-working hive and uses this as a refreshing metaphor to examine working life.”
In essence, “the beehive is the ultimate business case of complex organisations and working life today.”
Philip gifted me a limited-edition hard copy of his book around Christmas time, and I’ve loved perusing it ever since.
The book considers twelve key topics relevant for leadership in organisations today, including change, communication, continuous learning, decision making, diversity, purpose, productivity, teamwork and many more, all through the fascinating metaphor of an industrious beehive.
I’ve discovered a few favourite chapters and understand a little more about the life of bees, and the lessons they can teach us.
Dave was one of 12 guest writers who Philip partnered with to share additional or alternative views, helping to create a community of shared thinking or in other words some hive-logic!
Last night was not just about celebrating the launch of a book; it was about celebrating friendship, shared learning, and the power of collaboration.
Spending time with Philip, Dave, and so many like-minded professionals reminded me of the importance of community and the strength we find in exchanging ideas.
Philip’s ability to weave wisdom and leadership lessons from the natural world into our working lives is truly inspiring.
I wish you every success Philip with “Bee Wise” – may it continue to spark meaningful conversations and insightful reflections in organisations far and wide!
And to all those who have yet to pick up a copy, I wholeheartedly encourage you to dive in and discover the buzz for yourselves! 🐝
Bees thrive on teamwork; just as great leaders foster collaboration – I have a free limited edition signed hard copy to give away!
Tag a colleague, mentor, or friend who embodies the spirit of teamwork and share why they inspire you below.
I’ll pick a winner and send the signed copy to one lucky participant!

Are you following me?

My dear friend, Paul and I have a few things in common…
We were both born and raised in Dunfermline.
We both got married to someone from abroad.
We both have three children.
We both work in learning and development.
We both served in the England London Mission of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints 
We both served as Bishop of the Dunfermline Ward.
We both served as President of the Dundee Scotland Stake, me 2005 – 2014 and Paul currently.

Chance Encounters

And if the last few Saturday mornings are anything to go by, we both enjoy walking to fulfil our church Ministering assignments at the very same time!
As we’ve crossed paths in virtually the same spot these last few weeks, it’s become a bit of a running joke.
“𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒂𝒈𝒂𝒊𝒏? 𝑨𝒓𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒇𝒐𝒍𝒍𝒐𝒘𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒎𝒆, 𝒐𝒓 𝒂𝒎 𝑰 𝒇𝒐𝒍𝒍𝒐𝒘𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒚𝒐𝒖?”
These chance encounters have added a touch of humour and a smile to our faces in our shared commitment to serve others.
Whilst he is heading north, I am heading south!
Ministering has always held a special place in both of our hearts.
There’s something deeply rewarding about reaching out to others, offering a listening ear, a kind word, or simply letting someone know they’re remembered and loved.
It’s not just a duty; it’s a privilege – a way to follow the Saviour’s example of service and compassion.
We both share a passion for this work.
Even now, as it is his turn to carry the mantle of Stake President, his dedication to these simple but significant acts of care is inspiring.
We both know that real joy in ministering comes not from grand gestures, but from consistent, small acts of love and service.
And yet, life has a way of adding a touch of humour to even the most heartfelt endeavours.
It’s a light-hearted reminder that ministering doesn’t have to be stiff or overly formal, it’s about connection, warmth, and even a good laugh along the way.
As I reflect on these moments, I feel a deep sense of gratitude for Paul, for his leadership, friendship, and example.
Serving alongside him in this way reminds me that ministering is more than a responsibility; it’s a joyful journey we share together, one visit at a time.
What small acts of love and service have brought a smile to your face lately?

Faith at Work

Yesterday, I enjoyed catching up with some old colleagues and making some new friends in a virtual café for Fellows of the Association for Coaching.
There was an instant blend of warmth, trust, and camaraderie.
Our shared values and collective openness allowed us to learn and grow together.
The smiles, the attentive nods, the laughter, and the genuine curious interest in one another’s thoughts created a strong sense of belonging.
Some topics for our breakout rooms were suggested and off we went to share our thoughts.
I suggested a current topic at the forefront of my mind “faith friendly workplaces”.
What followed in the next 35 minutes was one of the most insightful and powerful coaching conversations I’ve ever had.
I am truly thankful for Tom Hennessy for his intuitive and penetrating questioning skills.
From the outset, he tuned into my thinking as I shared my experiences of an event I’d attended the day before.

Religious Freedom

At that event, I’d engaged with a diverse group of leaders, advocates, and thinkers who were passionate about the intersection of religious freedom and business.
Hosted by Louise Bailey of OVO, the gathering highlighted the vital role that workplaces play in fostering an environment where faith can be expressed openly and respectfully.
Brian J. Grim of the Religious Freedom and Business Foundation, shared his perspective on how recognising and respecting employees’ faith identities can enrich any workplace culture.
His stories underscored the importance of seeing faith as an integral part of diversity, just as important as race, gender, or any other characteristic.
The event also reminded me that creating faith-friendly workplaces wasn’t just about accommodating faith; it’s about empowering individuals to bring their whole selves to work.
Further, it’s about creating an environment where people feel seen, heard, and valued, not despite their faith but because of the richness it adds to who they are.
As I further reflected upon the conversations at the event, I realised how closely they align with the work I’m passionate about.
Coaching, after all, is about creating safe spaces for people to explore and grow.
If workplaces can become those safe spaces, where faith is acknowledged and respected, it could transform not just individual lives but entire organisational cultures.
Now, I have my work cut out as I consider how to bring my learning and coaching knowledge to this vital cause.
How can we foster workplaces that embrace faith as part of diversity?
It’s a challenge I’m eager to explore, and one I invite you to consider too.

 

Looking Back

“You’re looking well Dave” I said.
“And you too Daryl” he replied.
And so began our lovely lunch with one another, earlier this week in Stirling.
Dave and I were colleagues many years ago, collaborating on numerous large-scale, challenging projects during our time working together.
Lunch was delicious.
We got caught up on our family situations.
And we talked about what we were doing now.
But what we really enjoyed was taking time to reflect upon our many experiences we’d share together, twenty plus years ago.
Looking back allowed us to revisit past experiences with the clarity of hindsight.

New Insights

As we shared our thoughts and feelings, we found they often revealed insights that we’d missed in the moment, from many years ago.
Indeed, we found looking back useful, because it gave us both a new perspective.
Revisiting those moments with Dave added another layer of richness, as his perspective shed light on details I’d never considered.
Part of enjoying life lies in celebrating our accomplishments and milestones, and there were certainly plenty of those during the time Dave and I worked side by side.
Whilst reflecting on some of those daunting challenges we faced together, our shared response was, “I’d never thought about it quite like that before.”
Looking back isn’t just about nostalgia—it’s an opportunity for growth.
We both recognised how far we’d come and understood a little better how the many challenges we’d faced together had shaped us, and to some extent, influenced our future decisions.
There is something very powerful about reflecting on the past together.
We both realised how much we’d influenced each other; in ways we’d never considered.
Looking back certainly helped us to understand how our past experiences had shaped us, but somehow it also helped us to look ahead to the future with renewed confidence.
It was a real joy to strengthen our bonds of friendship, celebrate our successes and gain a deeper empathy for and understanding of each other – after far, far too long!
Thanks Dave – and I’ll pay next time!
When you look back on where you’ve been, how does it shape the way you see your path ahead?

A Ball of String

Recently I was asked, “As a facilitator, what are your favourite learning tools in your backpack?”
I smiled…
There are many “essentials” that I carry in my backpack when I facilitate a workshop.
– Pens, markers (sharpies or neuland refillables), dry board markers, paper, post it notes.
– CCS Cards, Organisation Cards and other cards to write on
– My laptop, a pointer/clicker, extra batteries, an external mouse and a thumb drive.
– Masking tape.
– Power adaptors
– Rubber bands and Paper clips
And last but not least, my very favourite, it goes everywhere, my 𝒃𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒐𝒇 𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈!
It’s a short list but these few supplies have gotten me out of a lot of jams, consistently bring energy to the room, and help me to create memorable moments in any learning session.
So why a ball of string?
A simple ball of string is often underestimated, but it is a highly effective tool in facilitation.
Its versatility makes it a powerful symbol and practical tool for measuring and demonstrating different behaviours and concepts in various workshops.
Here are 2 simple examples of how I’ve used it recently…

Example 1

As a measurement tool, by using it as a line on the floor and asking participants to gauge their thoughts and feelings about something.
For example, I explain that one end of the line is “Strongly Agree,” the opposite end is “Strongly Disagree,” and the middle represents a neutral stance.
The activity always involves making decisions about how much they agree or disagree with statements or questions that I ask.
On every occasion, I invite participants to position themselves on the line to indicate their view, leading to some fascinating discussion and varied opinions.
Another one I use string for is to help people understand the importance of connection and communication within a team.

Example 2

When one person talks or shares an idea, they hold onto the string and toss the ball to someone else.
As the string weaves across the group, it creates a visual web of connections, symbolising how each person’s input influences the others.
It can be a powerful illustration of interdependency in any team, and how communication flows through and binds a team together.
A ball of string is more than a basic tool as it can symbolise and practically demonstrate essential leadership behaviours.
What’s in your backpack?

Retreat and Recover

In my studies through the years, I find it fascinating that the leaders of three of the world’s great religions have one thing in common…
They understood the importance of stepping back from the world for personal reflection and renewal.
In ancient times, spiritual leaders sought refuge in nature or isolated spaces, understanding that it was in these quiet moments that clarity of purpose and direction emerged.
For example, the Buddha meditating under the Bodhi tree in northern India (the place of enlightenment) would form the foundation of Buddhism.
In the Quran, there are numerous accounts of the Prophet Muhammad receiving revelations and instruction from the Angel Gabriel in the cave of Hira, which shaped the world of Islam.
Jesus Christ often retreated from his followers into the wilderness to meditate and pray, helping him connect with deity in order to establish Christianity.
Each of them reminds us of the importance of stepping back from the world to take some time to reflect and recover.
Modern leaders can take inspiration from these examples by carving out time for reflection, not only to recharge physically but also to reassess their leadership and the broader impact of their decisions.
Whether in politics, business, or social organisations, leaders face constant pressures to perform, make decisions, and address challenges swiftly and effectively.

Torryburn

My experience on Saturday was a simple mini example of this, taking some uninterrupted time to be alone or in this case sharing it with someone special.
Monic and I took a 2 hour long walk along the seashore, borrowing my sister’s dog Fern.
We thoroughly enjoyed our time of rejuvenation, foraging for brambles along the way and taking time to pause, reflect, talk and recover.
In our fast-paced, hyper-connected world of today, the notion of retreating for renewal has in recent years, gained a renewed relevance, especially for leaders.
A retreat, whether it’s time spent in nature or engaging in deep meditation, offers a space to disconnect from noise and reconnect with oneself, which in turn fosters sharper judgment and greater creativity.
Regularly tending to the emotional, physical, spiritual and mental aspects of our lives keeps us in a well-resourced state.
I know that most of my innovative ideas come not from being in the middle of the action but from stepping back, in moments of solitude and reflection.
Just as spiritual figures like Buddha, Muhammad, and Christ found profound insights in times of isolation, you and I along with today’s leaders can benefit greatly from stepping away from daily responsibilities to recharge, reflect, and renew our sense of purpose.
Everyone needs to unplug, refocus, retreat and reboot sometimes.
Go on – make that time to retreat today….
You know you need to.