Tag Archive for: leadership

Small Moments, Big Shifts

Its been nearly two months since I stepped into my new leadership facilitation role with Aviva.
I’ve been busy learning lots about new programmes and perhaps most meaningfully, seeing the power of thinking partnerships.
One of my favourite moments in many of our recent Lead the Way workshops comes during a simple but powerful “buddy coaching” conversation.
There are four different variations of the programme, depending upon seniority level.
During each programme, individuals are frequently randomly paired together.
It’s there, that the coaching conversations begin.
One person reflecting, the other listening deeply and asking thoughtful questions.
We encourage them to be curious.
Two people, fully present, exploring what it means to grow.
On the surface, it seems like a short exercise.
However, I’ve noticed that it only takes a few intentional minutes with a learning buddy like this, to unlock something deeper, a fresh idea or perhaps a new direction for them to consider.

Sitting and Walking

Buddy coaching isn’t simply about sitting opposite each other at a table, some of the best conversations and discoveries are made whilst out for a walk together.
Changing the environment can really help each of us change how we look at things.
“Walking is man’s best medicine.” – Hippocrates
In their conversations, leaders ask each other:
• How would you describe yourself as a leader right now?
• What assumptions do you carry about leadership?
• What would ‘better’ look like for you?
Every time we run this exercise, there is a noticeable, yet subtle shift in the energy in the room, from quiet reflection to rich dialogue.
These short listening and questioning exercises help people slow down and connect.
Interestingly, another upside is they think more intentionally about how they lead and respond to change.
Sometimes the most profound learning moments don’t come from slides or theories, but from being truly heard by another person.
A simple reminder that great leadership often starts with great listening.
When was the last time you truly listened, not to respond, but to understand?

What’s in a Name?

As participants arrived in the room, one by one, they’re given their name tags.
At the same time, they tick their names off the participant list and registration is complete.
A few minutes later during our check in, everyone introduces themselves to the group.
But there’s one challenge that never seems to get any easier for me, even after years of practice… names!
Currently, every few days, I find myself faced with a fresh set of twenty to thirty or so new names to learn.
It’s no small task.
I’m not exactly sure why, but some are easy to remember, others take a few tries, and occasionally I’ll mix up two people completely, especially when there’s a Mark, a Matt, and a Martin in the same room!
Yesterday, the tables turned.
A couple of participants started calling me by the wrong name and not just once!
I could tell they felt a bit embarrassed when they realised, so, in the spirit of fun, I decided to join in.
When one of them said, “Thanks, Darren,” I smiled and replied, “No problem, Martin.” (His name was definitely not Martin.)
Cue a big smile and some laughter.
It broke the tension instantly.
The moment became fun and light-hearted.
Later, as we reflected on the day, I realised something simple yet powerful: learning names is an act of leadership.
It’s about presence.
It’s about seeing people.
When we take the time to remember someone’s name, we’re telling them, “You matter. You’re worth remembering.”
Getting it wrong occasionally?
That’s just part of the journey.
What matters is how we recover, with grace, humour, and a wee bit of warmth.
So, to all the participants out there.
Could you help us facilitator’s out?
If you spot us in an office somewhere, to ease the triggering of the mental panic, please say hello and quickly remind us of your name – just in case!
Leadership, at its best, is all about connection, and sometimes, connection begins with something as small as a name.
What other “small” leadership habits have a big impact on connection and belonging?
p.s. – maybe some bigger name tags may help too! 😅

Reflections from the Edge

Yesterday, I was co-facilitating a leadership session in Perth with my colleague Sophie Edmond.
Early in the session, we were talking about past leadership programmes the participants had attended.
As stories were shared, a favourite poem by Christopher Logue came to mind.
I recited it as best I could to the group and then after finding it again online, wrote it up on a flipchart…
𝑪𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒆𝒅𝒈𝒆.
We might fall.
Come to the edge.
It’s too high!
COME TO THE EDGE!
And they came,
and he pushed,
And they 𝒇𝒍𝒆𝒘.
Afterwards, I noticed a few puzzled expressions around the room.
I took some time to explain my thoughts.

From comfort to stretch zone

When asked to be a leader, it can often bring us right to the very edge of our comfort zone.
It can also challenge our capability, of what we think we can handle.
And yet, here they were, leaders from all walks of life, and different parts of the Aviva organisation, showing up with curiosity, openness, and the courage to start stretching their wings.
Yes, there was hesitation.
Yes, there was fear.
But there was also a real willingness to grow, to take risks, to learn and to move into their stretch zones.
Through my lifetime, I have learned that leadership is oftentimes about pushing past our fears.
Sometimes it’s about holding the space while others get ready.
But time and again, it’s about standing at the edge with your people… encouraging, challenging, supporting and knowing when to move forward together.
That’s what I witnessed in Perth yesterday.
Leaders on the edge.
Some nervous. Some unsure. But all leaning in.
Not just ready to learn, but ready to lead others to the edge, to fly… and beyond.
I can’t wait to be back with them all today and encourage a little more!
What are you doing and how are you helping others to find their wings?

Learning to Lead

Yesterday whilst co-facilitating the new Lead the Way leadership programme for Aviva in Perth, we got talking about our own leadership journeys for a wee while.
I shared one of my earliest stories.
In the summer of 1977, we had just moved house, and I had also just finished Primary School.
I was twelve years old.
There was lots of change going on for me and our family.
Everything felt a little unfamiliar a new place, new people, and the transition to High School ahead of me.
That summer I took on my first job, in an early morning paper round at the local newsagent.
It was easy enough, delivering newspapers in the quiet stillness before the day began.
But I didn’t just do the job; I paid attention.
I quickly learned the five different routes, how they worked, and who covered them.
Then, it wasn’t long before the newsagent began to trust me with more, including a few extra deliveries, managing new routes, then stepping in when others didn’t show.
Bit by bit, I found myself not just doing a job but being responsible for making sure it all ran smoothly.
Looking back, I see now that’s where my leadership journey quietly began.
Not with a title or a grand plan, but with trust, consistency, and a willingness to step up.
As John Maxwell said, “Leadership is not about titles, positions or flowcharts. It is about one life influencing another.”
That summer, I wasn’t thinking about leadership.
But I was learning how it starts, simply by showing up, taking responsibility, and earning trust.
That lesson has stayed with me ever since.
And as I reflect about it more this morning… maybe it began even earlier, when I was nine and made a seconder in the Cub Scouts, but that’s another story!
What about you?
What early experience taught you the value of responsibility?

Creating Space to Learn

Its been a quick week.

On Monday, I arrived at our venue a couple of hours before the start of the latest leadership session, I was just observing after all, but my fellow facilitators had been there for a good wee while longer!

Arriving early as a learning facilitator, is critical.

The magic however of a great learning experience doesn’t begin when the first participant walks into the room, it starts days, weeks and even months, before.

Long before a single chair is straightened or a workbook is placed on the table, facilitators are already deep in preparation.

For this programme, the preparation began in partnership, working closely with Korn Ferry Management Consultants to shape the design, alongside Aviva’s learning consultants to refine the flow and feel of the sessions.

From there came hours of reviewing materials, crafting thoughtful questions, building stories, and attending to the small details that help people connect and learn together.

Then of course there is hours of work done by our events team, who have been organising venues, coursebooks, materials, travel, meals, and most importantly of all – delegates!

This week our facilitators travelled from far and wide, bringing not only their suitcases but their energy, insights, and passion for helping others grow.

Arriving early to set up the space, check the slides, arrange materials, and make sure every table feels ready for learning, it’s all part of facilitation life.

Because when the first delegate walks in, everything should quietly say, you matter, and we’re ready for you.

Facilitation isn’t just about delivery.

It’s about intention. Preparation. Presence.

It’s about creating the conditions where learning can truly come alive.

What does great preparation look like in your world?

A Fireside Chat to Remember

Yesterday, I had the pleasure of observing a fireside chat with a senior leader unfold in the Lead the Way programme at Aviva in Perth.

It was enjoyable to sit there and watch the learning unfold.

As I understand it, a few days earlier, there was a short call between the facilitator and the cohort sponsor, to discuss the opportunity at hand.

That early conversation helped shape the flow, clarify expectations, and set the tone for what would become a powerful learning experience.

These chats don’t happen in every session, but are organised when calendars and time align.

From the moment the chat began, there was an openness in the room and a genuine curiosity to learn.

Course participants were invited to ask questions, and they were asked with warmth, thoughtfulness, and respect.

The leader’s responses were real, honest, and at times filled with humour.

Many personal stories brought key topics to life, offering both insights and reassurance that leadership, at its heart, is a human endeavour.

One of the standout moments came when someone asked, “How would you describe your work–life balance?”

The leader paused, smiled, and replied with calm confidence: “Disciplined. I have outside interests, things that are non-negotiable. They keep me grounded.”

That simple, authentic answer said it all.

Throughout the conversation, there was laughter, reflection, and a shared sense of purpose.

It wasn’t just a Q&A, for many in the room, it was a real live mentoring session.

The whole session sparked real connection, fostered networking, and built relationships across the cohort.

For me, it was a joy to see such a positive experience unfold, that blended insight, humility, and humanity in equal measure.

What stories from your own journey could help others see the human side of leadership?

A different kind of tired

I’ve had a great, but exhausting week!

At the start of the new leadership programme – Lead the Way, with Aviva in Perth, there’s a familiar pattern emerging.

People arrive mid-afternoon, often after an early start and a long journey.

They mostly arrive with a little travel tiredness, having transitioned from back-to-back meetings into something unknown.

After all, they’ve just stepped away from the buzz of their day jobs, where decisions are constant and time is tight.

So, we slow them down.

It’s one of the quiet, yet very special gifts of this programme: two full days where they’re not doing the day job, rather, they’re encouraged to think differently.

Reflecting.

Paying attention to themselves and others in ways they usually don’t have time for.

A New Tired

And yet by the end of those two days, my discovery this week is they’re still tired, just in a completely other way.

It’s not the tiredness of logistics or deadlines.

It’s the stretch that comes from working with new models, testing fresh ideas, and forming new connections, not only in their minds, but with each other too.

It takes a great deal of effort to tune into those emotions, to have honest conversations, and explore their own leadership habits.

It’s also the kind of tired that comes from meaningful work.

And somewhere in all that effort, I have witnessed many who start to see a shift in mindset.

A quiet clarity.

The occasional Aha moment where something lands differently and opens up in a new way.

It’s not always comfortable, but it is purposeful. And for many, it’s long overdue.

So yes, they do leave tired.

But it’s a good tired, for each of them.

A stretched, thoughtful, worthwhile kind of tired.

And from what I’ve seen, it’s the kind that stays with you.

When was the last time you were stretched in a way that felt meaningful?

New. Uncomfortable. Stretching.

Yesterday was my first time running the new Lead the Way leadership programme for Aviva in Perth.
I’d worked with my co-facilitator Jane many times online over the last 26 days, but this was the first time we had actually met in person.
So right from the start, I was feeling that mix of excitement and a wee bit of nerves too…
And I wasn’t the only one!
As delegates started arriving, there was a quiet tension in the waiting area.
A subtle mix of anticipation, nerves, and curiosity.
Uncomfortable, yes. But that’s often where the good stuff starts to happen.
Jane and I were definitely in the stretch zone too. After all we were delivering this session live together for the first time.
There’s always a bit of uncertainty when you’re doing something new, even if you’ve prepared.
Life has taught me for sure, that growth doesn’t happen in your comfort zone!
Early on in the session, we invited each delegate to pause and simply notice what they were feeling.
Not to fix it or fight it – just to notice.
There’s real power in staying present, in leaning into the awkward, uncertain, or emotionally charged moments and I have learned its essential for growth, but not easy for everyone.
We talked about how useful it is to stay with those tricky emotions rather than brushing them aside.
In leadership and in life too, I know that discomfort can show up right before something meaningful happens.
That ability of noticing without reacting is key when you’re leading teams too.
It can help you understand your own reactions and allows you to empathise with the emotions of your team.
By the end of the day, everyone had started to explore their own leadership style with more honest feelings.
There was more openness, more self-awareness, and definitely a bit more ease in the room too.
It was a solid start and a good reminder that discomfort isn’t a sign you’re doing it wrong.
Most of the time, it means you’re right where you need to be.
Day 2 – here we come!
What helps you stay grounded when things feel uncertain?

Savouring the Small Moments

Over the last couple of weeks, I’ve had the privilege of sitting in a large training room and simply watching learning unfold.
The leadership programmes I have been attending stretch over 2 days, beginning mid-afternoon on Day 1, flowing through a full Day 2, and closing at lunch on Day 3.
Yesterday, as the programme drew to a close, and we started to slow down, we stood together in a large circle for final reflections.
In our last 15 minutes, participants were invited to share their learning takeaways, the “a-ha” moments that had lifted, inspired, or even changed the way they think.
What struck me wasn’t the grand or dramatic revelations, but the 𝒔𝒎𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒐𝒏𝒆𝒔.
A phrase that stuck.
A comment from a colleague.
A small moment of courage.
A shift in perspective.
A subtle insight that sparked a smile.
These were the things each delegate had chosen to hold onto and savour.
It reminded me of something important about leadership: so often we think learning has to come in big packages, huge breakthroughs, bold strategies, dramatic change.
But yesterday reminded me that it’s the little things that often make the biggest difference.
It has been my life experience that great leaders pay attention to the 𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒕𝒍𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 and encourage others to do the same.
Over the next few days, why not watch out for those small learning moments that deserve a little more savouring.
The subtle experiences you might otherwise overlook.
The quiet insights that whisper rather than shout.
Notice them. Capture them. Reflect on them.
Because sometimes, the smallest takeaway carries the deepest learning and the greatest power to shape lasting change.
What small moment this week has taught you the biggest lesson?

Foiled Again!

This week, like last, I’ve been quietly observing the new leadership programmes at Aviva in Perth.
But there’s another, less formal, daily challenge I face alongside my fellow facilitators, and it comes wrapped in foil!
Every morning, the catering team lays out a display of Tunnock’s finest: tea cakes, snowballs, caramel logs, and my personal favourite – caramel wafers.
It’s an iconic Scottish institution after all, a proud family-run business.
And here’s the problem.
Because while the visiting delegates (currently mostly from England) dig in, (its hospitality after all and a wee taste of Scotland), I find myself staring at the table, having a little internal leadership moment.
It’s a daily test of self-discipline.
It sounds silly, right? It’s just a biscuit!
But self-discipline is one of the most underrated traits of great leadership for anyone who wants to lead the way.
It’s about the choices we make when no one’s watching, especially the small ones. And those small choices can all add up.
I must admit to having failed once or twice last week.
If I can’t say no to a caramel wafer at the next break, how will I hold a boundary under pressure?
How will I stay committed to the long-term over the easy win?
How will I model the kind of leadership I expect from others?
The truth is simply this, self-discipline isn’t about denying joy, rather It’s about directing it.
Choosing long-term growth over short-term gratification.
Building habits that make future decisions easier.
And in leadership, those habits ripple out, that can shape culture, model behaviours and build trust.
So, this week, I’ve started to leave left the Tunnock’s on the table.
Not because I don’t love them (I really do), but because I love what I’m building more, and that starts with leading myself.
I think I’ll keep a wee eye on my fellow facilitators too!
Or am I the only one facing this regular test?
Besides… they’ll still be there next week. Probably. Maybe. 😉
What small habit could you build this week that reflects the kind of leader you want to be?