Have you considered the many different roles you have in life?

Our roles are the relationships and responsibilities that we have in life. Each of us holds various roles at the same time.  Subsequently, each of us will face times when the various roles we play may compete with each other, forcing us to consider who we are and consequently what role should take precedence in a particular moment.  There may be days when you feel torn and unsure if you’re doing the right thing and making the right choices. When those moments come (and they will), pause, take a deep breath and remind yourself what matters most- you are simply one person!

Each of us can make our own list of the roles we have.  For example here are a few of my own: Husband, father, son, brother, uncle, cousin, coach, facilitator, trainer, writer, blogger, friend, volunteer, learner, steward, provider and so the list goes on.

Have you ever thought about your own roles recently?  Your roles will change in priority day to day, for example through the week, you may be more focused on career and work goals, trying to balance a few others in between.  Whilst at the weekend you may focus on a parental role, or a hobby, volunteering or serving others.  Creating a list and putting each of these roles into a priority ranking will really help you to figure out what matters most.  In amongst all of these roles – remember the most important role in life is being you!  So frequently ask yourself:

  • What do I need physically – rest, exercise, less food, more food?
  • What do I need mentally – stimulation, meditation?
  • What do I need emotionally – solitude, support, security, a pick up treat?
  • What do I need socially – interactions with friends, new connections?

Get into the habit of asking yourself these questions often, then pick the thing you need to do and do it for yourself that day.

As you consider each of your roles in life and figure out what matters most, the question will almost certainly arise “how well do I fill these roles?”  Or for that matter “what kind of performance have I been giving of late?” Or even “what kind of feedback  have I been getting in some of the roles I fill?”  Recently, I have been challenged to consider my own performance in a few of those roles.  In some areas I have rated myself doing well, in others I have some real areas that need attention.  Frankly, its a bit of a mixed bag.


Every now and again it’s good to reflect on your roles and visit them one by one.  Maybe it’s time for a bit of a spring clean and as you prioritise your own, perhaps there are one or two lower down the list that could be eliminated, especially if time is an issue and you have too many roles.  As we journey through life the roles themselves and our own priorities will change.  As our children are growing, I recognise how little time I have left with them in our own family home, subsequently in my own list of priorities it is ranking near the top.

Stop, pause and reflect on your roles, determine to do better and focus on what really matters most.  What will you do differently today?