Tag Archive for: growth mindset

We Are Our Thoughts

Our thoughts are incredibly powerful.
They affect us in many ways – our mood, our behaviours and our outlook on life.
I’ve always loved the scripture in Proverbs 23:7, “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he…”
Recently I have been paying much more attention to the things I am thinking every day.
I consider whether my thoughts are positive, negative or even neutral.
…Apply the proverb to real life…
If my thoughts are filled with positivity, then so I will be.
…with negativity, then so I will be.
We literally become our thoughts.
We 𝒂𝒓𝒆 our thoughts.
In short – I am learning again that the quality of my thoughts has a direct impact on the quality of my life.
I love this quote by Dr. Wayne Dyer: “If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change”
Subsequently, if you want to have a more meaningful and purposeful life, then begin to pay more attention to the things you think about every day.
Start by considering the things you tell yourself every day.
For example, are you struggling with someone?
A spouse, partner, a sibling, parents, a friend, or a workmate perhaps?
Pause for a moment and stop yourself.
Watch your thoughts…
Do you see what is happening in that moment?
What do you think about in your heart, when you think of them?
What do you notice?
Are your thoughts negative or positive?
If its negative, challenge yourself, and your thinking.
For me those challenges start early in the morning, when I make plans for the day ahead.
Start by engaging new positive thoughts and watch them start to grow day by day.
See how it feels.
I am relearning that when we change your thoughts, you can change your life, one thought at a time.
What would happen if you took just one thought today and intentionally shifted it from negative to positive?

Looking Back

“You’re looking well Dave” I said.
“And you too Daryl” he replied.
And so began our lovely lunch with one another, earlier this week in Stirling.
Dave and I were colleagues many years ago, collaborating on numerous large-scale, challenging projects during our time working together.
Lunch was delicious.
We got caught up on our family situations.
And we talked about what we were doing now.
But what we really enjoyed was taking time to reflect upon our many experiences we’d share together, twenty plus years ago.
Looking back allowed us to revisit past experiences with the clarity of hindsight.

New Insights

As we shared our thoughts and feelings, we found they often revealed insights that we’d missed in the moment, from many years ago.
Indeed, we found looking back useful, because it gave us both a new perspective.
Revisiting those moments with Dave added another layer of richness, as his perspective shed light on details I’d never considered.
Part of enjoying life lies in celebrating our accomplishments and milestones, and there were certainly plenty of those during the time Dave and I worked side by side.
Whilst reflecting on some of those daunting challenges we faced together, our shared response was, “I’d never thought about it quite like that before.”
Looking back isn’t just about nostalgia—it’s an opportunity for growth.
We both recognised how far we’d come and understood a little better how the many challenges we’d faced together had shaped us, and to some extent, influenced our future decisions.
There is something very powerful about reflecting on the past together.
We both realised how much we’d influenced each other; in ways we’d never considered.
Looking back certainly helped us to understand how our past experiences had shaped us, but somehow it also helped us to look ahead to the future with renewed confidence.
It was a real joy to strengthen our bonds of friendship, celebrate our successes and gain a deeper empathy for and understanding of each other – after far, far too long!
Thanks Dave – and I’ll pay next time!
When you look back on where you’ve been, how does it shape the way you see your path ahead?

Nobody is a Nobody

𝐍𝐨𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐧𝐨𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲!
Through my life, career and church service, oftentimes I’ve heard phrases like “what does it really matter, I’m nobody,” or “I’m just one of the thousands, I’m nobody really”.
Perhaps in the past you may have felt you were a nobody, or maybe you are feeling right now that you are a nobody?
“We do ourselves a great injustice when we allow ourselves, through tragedy, misfortune, challenge, discouragement, or whatever the earthly situation, to so identify ourselves. No matter how or where we find ourselves, we cannot with any justification label ourselves “nobody.”” – said Marvin J. Ashton.
Frequently life, work and family challenges can get us down and cause us to question who we really are. We doubt ourselves, we doubt our self worth and confidence may fail us. I have been in too many coaching conversations where that has been the case.
Please, please be assured – you are a somebody!!!
You are endowed with great gifts, unique capabilities, special talents all waiting to be discovered, developed and finely tuned.
Each of us are needed.
You are unique.
You are where you are supposed to be.
No one, absolutely no one can take your place.
Everybody is somebody to me.
My simple invitation today is to invite you to be somebody, nobody thought you could be.

Doubt your Doubts

“No, I just can’t do it!” said the coachee.
As a professional coach I have heard that comment on so, so many occasions. It is frequently followed by limiting or debilitating stories of some kind of another.
Centuries ago addressing this issue William Shakespeare in “Measure for Measure” wrote; “Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt.”
Much has been written in more recent recent years about our mindset.
Listening to Max Whitlock the British Gymnast after winning his 3rd Olympic Gold medal yesterday, he talked about the importance of a growth mindset, by focusing on the process and ignoring the distractions that come, then enjoying the challenge as much as the conclusion.

𝐒𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐓𝐢𝐩𝐬

Another way to look at is to doubt your doubts, before you doubt yourself, by addressing your inner critic directly.
– In short – question your doubt!
– Face the fear, look at it and break it down into smaller actionable steps.
– Remember most folks have impostor-y feelings, fairly often, its quite normal!
– Focus on what you can do and not on what you can’t do.
Remember the view that you adopt for yourself will profoundly affect the way you lead your life.
What can you do today to dismiss those doubts?

Baby Steps

𝑨 𝒋𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒆𝒚 𝒐𝒇 𝒂 𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒔𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒎𝒊𝒍𝒆𝒔 𝒃𝒆𝒈𝒊𝒏𝒔 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒂 𝒔𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒍𝒆 𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒑 – Chinese Proverb.
Arriving in a different country, understanding a new culture and an unfamiliar language can be overwhelming at times – it certainly isn’t an instant process!
It has been over 26 years since Monic and I have lived in the Netherlands and we are already noticing how so many things have changed.
That said, one big thing that I have already learned is the value and importance of taking 𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒔𝒎𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒃𝒂𝒃𝒚 𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒑 𝒂𝒕 𝒂 𝒕𝒊𝒎𝒆.

The first few steps

Tentatively, we have taken our first few steps of exploration in and around our local area. It is so beautiful, with lovely scenic walks and the people are so friendly.
Meeting with each of our missionaries one by one, has been an absolute joy.
For the first time yesterday, I was able to travel from one destination to another in the car with only a little help from the GPS. Driving can be especially challenging, especially due to the high volume of traffic and the proliferation of cyclists, everywhere!
Sitting in meetings where the language is completely Dutch no longer feels quite so painful or complete gobbledygook.
Slow, but sure, steady progress.
I have found that many of the happiest and most successful people I have encountered in life have achieved their level of life and work success by taking small baby steps, and then making one positive choice after another.
Positive new habits and routines are created incrementally, one baby step at a time. Indeed, it is through the process of change, that we discover who we really are. Patiently and carefully I am learning to lengthen my stride, one little baby step at a time!
What is a small, first step you can take and implement now in the changes you are facing in life?

New beginnings

I know I can’t turn back time, but this I do know…… it’s never too early and it’s never too late for a new beginning.

“Four young men sit by the bedside of their dying father. The old man, with his last breath, tells them there is a huge treasure buried in the family fields. The sons crowd around him crying, “Where, where?” but it is too late. The day after the funeral and for many days to come, the young men go out with their picks and shovels and turn the soil, digging deeply into the ground from one end of each field to the other. They find nothing and bitterly disappointed, abandon the search……

…𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗻𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝘀𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗼𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝗮𝗿𝗺 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝗶𝘁𝘀 𝗯𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝗿𝘃𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿.”
– As told by Benjamin Zander in “The Art of Possibility”

Perhaps now is a good time to refine your plans for future harvests.

Is it time to start and dig a little deeper perhaps?
What new beginnings lie ahead for you?